Last Chance
by Calzona1
Summary: Post Season 14 except Arizona never went to New York with Sofia. What could happen during Callie’s visit in Seattle? Would it bring them good? Or would it just bring the worse out of the situation?
1. One

1

It was another rainy day in Seattle, what could have been an ordinary day for Arizona turned out to be one of the most dragging and heavy afternoon. She started this day alright, was called at 5:00 in the morning to jump in and help in a surgery, did rounds at 7:00 am, did another surgery by 9 am, rendered consults, reviewed a lot of cases for her surgeries in the following days, she was even able to squeeze in a heated lunch at Carina's office for half an hour before heading back to her own. It was already 1:00 in the afternoon and she was readying herself for her last consult, which was 10 minutes late now, before heading home until she was called in for trauma.

"What do we have?" She said ready in action. Guess she'll be staying over for hours before her much awaited 2 day off.

"21 year old, MVA, 26 weeks pregnant, multiple fractures on her limbs and ribs. GCS 5. We're hearing aproximately 80 heartbeats per minute with the baby." she felt her stomach turn seeing a familiar brunette covered in blood as the emt gurneyed the patient down.

She was supposed to be meeting her 10 minutes ago. Alive and jolly, not like this.

"Dr. Robbins, they are your patients. What's the baby's situation?"

"Baby has ectopia cordis, very critical. If we don't deliver this baby now we won't be able to save any of them. Get OR 1 ready. Page ortho, Wilson you're scrubbing in and page Karev too, we will need extra set of hands for the baby." She said not wanting to waste any more time.

"Dr. Robbins, please save her, please. I don't— I don't know how this happened. We were so happy, we were so excited to come here for the appointment, suddenly there was this super fast car and—and" she felt sorry for the young blonde in front of her and couldn't help but notice blood running through her forehead.

"Donna! Donna! Have your self get checked you are bleeding too. I will try to save them—"

Arizona tried to stop her tears from falling and let her eyes gaze to an almost lifeless brunette in the gurney. She knew this would be an impossible case, another heartache that's bound to happen. And then she stared back at the tiny pale blonde, shaking, her eyes of green were filled with tears, she shivered with the idea but it was like she saw herself in her.

"I will try to save them but I won't promise anything." She said in almost a whisper.

"Let Dr. Kepner run some test on you."—

"No...no...no... Dr. Robbins— Arizona, please let her live, for me. And the baby, Oh God, she loves the baby." The young blonde in front of her plead.

Suddenly she felt her feet heavy. Her hands were shaking and her breathing, it's as if it was too difficult to breathe. These were all too familiar. She felt her scars reopened.

Car accident.

Blood.

Brunette.

Blonde.

Baby.

She knew both of these ladies, in fact they may be her favorite client for weeks now, one may be because these two reminded her so much of her and Callie. They were two young couples. One got pregnant while away at college and the other just accepted the whole situation and was willing to be a part of the other's journey through parenthood although both are not out yet. Arizona has been told by both ladies that she was the only person who knew they were a couple. Arizona's fondness with them grew consult after consult, so much that she may have shared some experiences she had with Callie.

Callie.

Remembering her name doesn't help much in calming her nerves right now. It still feels like rubbing salt on an open wound.

"Arizona. Arizona. Dr. Robbins!" She heard Hunt's voice enough to break her trance.

"OR 1 is ready and they're wheeling the patient in now—"

"Okay" she said and was readying to leave when Hunt pulled her near him.

"I know this is all too familiar for you. Are you sure you can handle this with your emotions set aside?"

"I'm okay. Please keep an eye on her." She said pertaining to the young blonde, who was now being treated by April.

"Donna. She's scared right now and she might be losing 2 important people today. Please keep an eye on her. She's scared and she will need someone to hold her." She said before running to save her patients.

beeeeeeep*

Flat line and silence filled the room. The other doctors, nurses and everyone else surely heard Arizona Robbins' whimper, a sign that the tough surgeon was in tears. Arizona was known to put her emotion aside in times like this. She barely cry in front of people when a patient dies on her table. She was trained well to keep her face straight and act professional whenever it happens but this time it was different. She had her heart on her sleeve and her tears aren't helping.

"Time of death 2:15 pm" she called out. Her breaths louder than the words she was trying to say. Taking a deep breath she focused on another life they could be saving.

"I'm closing now. Karev, how's the baby?"

"Shit!" She heard Alex say before even giving her an answer. The baby was born with her heart outside of her body which Arizona was aware of, hence, why they were on her service.

"There was a rupture at the IVC and the stitch is not holding, there's too much bleeding right now Arizona and I can't..."

Arizona just wanted to fall on the floor. She just lost Sarah, the mother of the child, a 21 year old ballet dancer who reminded her so much of Callie and now they're losing the baby too. She could only think of Donna and the heartbreak this would cause her. It's almost Christmas and this has to happen. Everything was blurring out until she heard Alex's code.

"Charge it to 5. Clear!"

"Shit, no. No. Hang in there little guy."

She heard Alex say. It was only when she heard a clear line that confirmed this was one of her worse days as a doctor.

"I'm sorry, Zona" she heard Alex say more as her friend than as a Doctor. Alex has teased her enough in focusing on this case too much because of this couple's resemblance with her and Callie. She has denied it a thousand times with him but Alex knew better.

"Call it, Karev." She just said without any hint of emotion at all.

"Time of death, 2:23pm."

Arizona stopped whatever she was doing and put all the instruments in her hand down.

"Dr. Wilson, finish it up. I'll deliver the news to the family." She said before stepping out of the OR.

Arizona was glad to have the her office all to herself for a good 30 minutes. Lights were dim and she didn't even bother turning them up as she wallows through all her emotions.

April tried her best to leave her friend alone to give her some space but decided that 30 minutes was enough.

"Hey." She quietly sat on the couch, beside her friend. Arizona's head was resting on the back pillows. April could see the glimmer of tears streaming from her friend's eyes.

"Donna had minor injuries and her head CTs were clear. She was waiting for you before she got discharged. She wanted to say thank you for being the best doctor for her friend and the baby and that she didn't mean to cuss at you. She was just looking for someone else to blame..." April explained.

After delivering the news to the young blonde, she has outed some painful words against Arizona and all the doctors involved. It was a normal reaction for sure but Arizona felt her words, she knows where her client was coming from. And in their field of work, to act as a professional all you have to say is "we did the best thing we could to save the patient." , turn around and never look back.

Arizona stayed quiet. She just closed her eyes letting the rest of her tears fall.

"You know it's not your fault that they died right? They were practically already dead when they arrived, the mom and the kid. You did your best to try and save them, Zona. You don't need me to say this but I still would...This happens a lot of time—"

"I could have been her." She cut her friend off finally breaking her silence.

"What?"

"I could have been Donna." She said almost a whisper. April was lost at first but has managed to take a deep breath in when she realized what her friend was saying.

"I could have lost Sofia and Callie too in that accident. But I didn't. I was lucky enough that I didn't." Arizona added.

"Arizona" April tried to argue but was cut off by the blonde.

"Yet I took that gift for granted and I still managed to push Callie away from me. I pushed them away from me. I cheated on my wife... twice and expected her to understand me, to forgive me and to still accept me. And then I got mad that she didn't. And when she finally found someone else and wanted to start anew I fought her hard against it."

"But you still let her leave and even allowed Sofia to be with her. You both made mistakes, Arizona. Everybody does."

"What did Callie ever do to me anyway? She cut my leg off? That was it? She only did it because she wanted to save me, in the end it was still for me. I became a monster to her and she remained my Calliope and what did I do in return? I fucking slept with someone else. Callie and Sofia almost died on me. I prayed for their life and when He did give them back, I just fucked things up."

"Arizona, look at me. You need to forgive and you need to start here." April grabbed Arizona's hand and put it on the blonde's chest. "Forgive yourself. Yes you did make a lot of mistakes. Yes you've hurt people but didn't we all? Aren't we all sinners? Forgive yourself, forgive Callie too but forgive yourself first."

A tragic death and an emotional talk with April took a toll on her. She needed to unwind for the rest of her day off. She was deciding wether to ask Alex for a drink at Joe's but it was still too early to drink or maybe call her girlfriend, ask if she could get off work early to be with her but she knows that would be impossible knowing how busy Carina is with her research. She didn't wanna go home on an empty apartment just yet. These are the moments she most hoped she had Sofia. She missed her daughter and it ached her heart knowing she still has a week before she could have her daughter back.

"Mommy! Mommy!"

She knew that familiar voice. Shaking her head lightly, she held out a little laugh as she fix her bag readying herself to go home. She must be hallucinating. She just miss her daughter so much.

Sleep, that is what she needs. She will go home and sleep her ass off.

"Mommy!"

It was when two tiny arms rested on her stomach, coming from behind her that she realized she wasn't dreaming. It was real. Her precious daughter whom she has been missing for months was really hugging her. Here in Seattle, in her office.

"Baby girl!" She squealed, she turned around fast and carried her little princess who is now too heavy for her without minding her buckling leg. She felt her tears. This is just what she needed. A little Sofia loving... but why was her daughter here?

"What— how— who." Her eyes wandered throughout the room until a pair of brown eyes met her ocean blues.

She could not believe it. The gods must have heard her calling that they gave her what she needed for today.

"Calliope."


	2. Two

2

"Calliope"

It's true when they said a home is not a place you live in but rather the people you love cause when she heard her name slip out from Arizona's lips just like how she calls her the only way she could, it felt like home to her.

This view with Arizona carrying Sofia in her arms has always been her home. An overwhelming surge of emotions built up from her insides. It has been 2 crazy years of roller coaster rides in New York and here she is again in Seattle, in front of her ex-wife who she admittedly missed. Fighting her best to keep her emotions at bay, she managed to say a little "Hey" to the blonde and turned her gaze to Sofia.

"Mija, what did I say about being carried?" The way she shot her eyebrows up, Sofia already knew that she needed to follow whatever her Mama was trying to remind her.

As she remembered a certain rule she had run with her Mama during their plane ride, she shot her goofy face up and wriggled herself out of her Mommy's arm.

"I'm sorry Mommy, was I heavy? Did I hurt your leg?" She sweetly asked her Mom once she was standing on her own.

"Oh it's okay honey, I just missed you so much but you did get really big Sof, can you slow down for Mommy, please?" Arizona said in her sing song voice as she lowered herself to attack her daughter with her kisses. Her sadness from a while back was definitely already washed over by this surprise. Sofia really has a way to replace all her sad to happy by just her mere presence.

This little brunette has been saving Arizona's life since the day she heard her heartbeat for the first time. Her smile grew even wider as she remembered the day Callie was freaking out about her pregnancy that she decided to camp out her OB's testing room for hours. It drove Arizona crazy but it sent Mark over to his limit that it made her laugh to see his face turn red with frustration. That was the moment she realized that she was in it. That she couldn't live without their crazy family, Her, Callie, The Baby and surprisingly that day, she has accepted that Mark would come with the baby too. There was a heartbeat and she suddenly had insights in her future with the people she was willing to spend the rest of her life with. Looking back made her realize a lot of mistakes she did in her lifetime but one thing's for sure, Sofia will never be one of those.

"Thank you Calliope." She muttered.

Callie saw a glimpse of sadness in Arizona's eyes. Sure she was smiling right now but she just knew the woman so well. She cried, maybe right before they even came to see her. And she must have been crying hard cause the crease on her forehead and on both sides of her nose were still visible.

"Arizona, are you okay?" She couldn't stop herself from worrying.

"I am. I am okay." The woman stood abruptly, brushing off Callie's question, and wiped the non visible tear from her eye. She didn't even bother staring back at Callie who knew better, she didn't want to be caught lying.

"I'm just so happy that Sofia's here. Which makes me wonder why. Shouldn't I be getting her next week? Is everything okay in New York?" Now it was her turn to ask.

After the Sofia mishaps in Seattle which was just a few months ago, Arizona came up with the most selfless decision, she allowed Sofia to be with Callie. She changed their rotations. Now Sofia is staying in New York with her Mama and she will stay there, no more switching schools in Seattle. She just wanted Sofia for some holidays and all of her school breaks and she promised to visit New York from time to time just to be with Sofia. She remembered Callie crying over the phone as she was saying her thank yous. Arizona would do everything for Sofia even if it means breaking her own heart.

"I-I know, but I have a conference in the next three days here in Seattle and while I'm here, Bailey wanted me to do a consult on one of her patients so I've decided to just tag Sofia along with me. You get her a little early. I hope that's fine with you but if you already made plans that's fine too. She can stay with me at Mer's." Callie was babbling.

"No! No plans! Callie this is amazing. I'm always happy to have Sofia. Nothing's too early with her." She said as she hugged her daughter.

"Are you staying til Christmas?" Arizona asked.

"Uhm, yeah. I'll be at Meredith's. You can come there too with Sofia, I mean, she said it's an open house. But then again if you already made plans that's okay too." She said really fast, Arizona didn't say a word, she just smiled at her as an answer. And Callie got the hint.

"Oh. She already invited you. And you're coming cause that's how Christmas is in Seattle." She almost laughed at herself and Arizona nodded with her.

"See you Christmas Eve then." She told the blonde. She could feel her ice cold fingers inside her pocket.

"Arizona— Sofia, baby girl." A voice with thick italian accent passed through the door right behind Callie. When she followed the voice she saw a hot brunette in her pink scrubs, the lady was gorgeous and effortlessly sexy and the way she called Arizona's name was definitely hotter than she ever called her ex-wife. Wait... was she comparing? Was she feeling insecure? The Calliope Torres has insecurities? She gulped when the woman went straight to kiss Arizona on her lips and bent down to hug Sofia. So this is the girlfriend.

"Auntie Carina!!!" Her daughter excitedly squealed. Her daughter likes the girlfriend too. How perfect.

"Uhm. Carina. Honey, this is Callie. My-uhm-Sofia's Mama. Callie, this is Carina."

"Oh hi! Yes, Dr. Calliope Torres. The ex-wife." Carina said as she motioned her head towards Arizona. The audacity of this woman. She thought to herself. And Calliope? How dare she?

"I've heard so much about you." She winked at her and before Calllie's eyebrows reached the ceiling, Carina pulled her in for a hug. "Don't worry they're all good things." She whispered in her thick sexy accent.

Was that flirting? Was she flirting? God, this woman's sex appeal is oozing.

Callie stared at Arizona and she saw the latter's uncomfortable smile.

"A Badass surgeon, a badass mom and a badass ex-wife not to mention how gorgeous you are in person too. I'm in for a tough competition huh?"

"Carina." Arizona whispered for her to stop. Carina could be really blunt and playful at times, this was her normal, Arizona knew but Callie may not be used to it. And for Callie to be this quiet still, she knows it's not a good thing.

"What?" Callie said almost the same time as Arizona.

"What? Oh I'm sorry. What I'm saying is it's really nice to finally meet you Calliope." Carina explained.

Arizona felt Callie wince by the mention of her first name for the second time. Callie hates it.

"Callie." Callie suggested. Arizona saw that coming.

"How about, we all have dinner tonight?" Arizona suggested to clear the awkwardness in the air.

"Sure! Perfect! I'll be off early. And I know a certain lady too who would want to grab ice cream after dinner." Carina hinted at Sofia.

The little lady gasped. "Yaaaaay!" The young brunette hugged Carina's leg.

"Callie, you should join us." Carina suggested.

"Oh, no. It's fine. You guys could go. I have a meeting with Bailey." No you don't.

"But Mama." Sofia ran to her side and grabbed her hand.

"You promised me that if I was a good girl during the plane ride we would both have dinner with Mommy. I was a good girl wasn't I?" And then here's Sofia tugging her heart. She gulped, hoping that Arizona didn't get what Sofia said.

Carina's gaze went to Arizona who didn't even bother looking back, her eyes were glued to Callie and Sofia, clearing her thoughts, she might have just seen a smile from Arizona's lips that she's never seen before.

"We can wait after your meeting, Callie. You should come join us." She just said. Carina followed Arizona's gaze and cleared her throat.

"See you later, Callie?" Carina tried to clear whatever's in the air.

"How can I say no to this?" Callie answered looking at Sofia and squeezed her daughter's cheek.

"You wait for Mama okay? Be a good girl." She told Sofia and gave her favorite girl a kiss. Sofia nodded in excitement.

"I'll go ahead to get this meeting over and done with. See you both later." She told the older women.

"And Carina, it was nice to meet you." She smiled at the other brunette who now has her arm around Arizona's waist.

Right when she stepped out of Arizona's office, she heard Carina whispered with concern.

"Honey, I heard what happened. Are you okay?"

"I am, now that you and Sofia are here." She heard Arizona say and pretended not to see the way Arizona quickly planted a kiss on her girlfriend's lips with Sofia smiling at them.

Callie's heart clenched like it did when she found out Arizona had cheated on her, only worse cause now she really isn't Arizona's person anymore. She isn't the person Arizona calls on her bad day, she's no longer the one she runs to when she needed to be home. So she know's she couldn't put a fight on this one.

With that she clenched her bag's handle over her shoulder and held her breath. Walk tall, Torres. As if she heard Mark's voice inside her head. Walk tall, except she couldn't. 2 years ago she would have exchanged an ugly banter with Carina and she's pretty sure she would end up fighting with Arizona over it but she isn't that Callie anymore. That badass Calliope Torres has been long gone.

...

"Torres, you're too early for tomorrow."

"I know, Bailey. Can't I say hi to a friend?"

Bailey stood from her desk with wide smile and gave Callie a hug. Callie went straight to the Chief's office after her Carina and Arizona encounter. She lied, there was no meeting to attend to.

"Oh okay, I figured you're not here as a Doctor." The shorter woman said with angst.

"Nope. I'm not. Oh look at you playing Chief of surgery, Miranda." She teased her.

"Oh stop it. How have you been doing Calliope Torres? You look... well... you look... hella exhausted." Miranda being Miranda, she was still very straightforward.

"It was nice to see you too, Bailey." She answered as she invited herself on the couch near Bailey's office desk.

"Where's little Torres?"

"She's with Arizona."

"Oh... so that explains the face." Bailey commented.

"What face?"

"The- I just saw my ex-wife and maybe her new girlfriend too-face."

Callie just sighed.

"So you did meet Carina."

I did. But she didn't say anything back.

"Pretty hot isn't she. I'm sure I'm not into vaginas but I would turn gay for that lady any day."

"Miranda!" Callie gasped.

"Have you seen her?" Miranda answered as if it was the most obvious thing.

"I did." Callie said in defeat.

"Then you know what I'm talking about... what the hell happened with your hand Callie?" Miranda switched the topic when she noticed the gauze covering Callies hand.

"Accident." She quickly hid it and smiled at Bailey.

"Which is why I can only do consults and not surgery. Not at least after 2 weeks... or maybe three... depends." She answered.

"You better have insured those million dollar hands." Bailey sarcastically said. Callie just rolled her eyes at her.

"I have to go now, I'll leave you in this office. I'm guessing you're just here to hide after seeing the ex-wife—"

"I'm leaving too Bailey. You know where Meredith is?" She cut her off.

"She's in surgery. OR 3, go hide your ass in there."

"Bailey, when you see Arizona and she asks why you're not in a meeting with me, just tell her you're rescheduling it tomorrow." Wider smile was plastered on her face after seeing Bailey's reaction.

"I'm resche—Torres, you are a hot mess."

"Please?" She asked her friend once again.

Bailey just nodded in response, her gaze went from Callie's face to Callie's injured hand and tried to get a hold of it after seeing how sloppy it was covered, Callie may be an Ortho goddess but covering your own injuries would always look this nasty. The doctor in her wanted to inspect her friend's hand.

"Leave it, Bailey." Callie said as she withdrew her hand away.

"I'm letting you go today but I'm checking that hand tomorrow, in a meeting which I rescheduled." Bailey said in her scary sarcastic tone and threw Callie a meaningful look.

Damn it.


	3. Three

**A/N: WOW! I'm overwhelemed by the mixed reaction this story is getting. Thanks to those who loved it and thanks also to those who didn't. Thank you for being honest. I just wish you guys could trust me with this story. I had this in mind for a very long time and contemplated wether or not to post it because of the very same reason. But trust me when I say there's nothing more in this world that I want than to have Callie and Arizona's happy ending. Please read the comment section, posted something in there too. :) and english is not my first language so please be kind LOL anyway sending you all Calzona love and here's chapter 3. **

She spent a good hour and a half watching Meredith's surgery from the gallery. She just sat there at the back corner wishing people won't recognize her but being a part owner of the hospital it was just impossible. She had photos plastered in the organizational charts displayed in some lobbies and offices within the hospital. Plus, she was only gone for 2 years so some of her previous colleagues were still employed here.

It took a long time for Meredith to recognize a familiar face watching her surgery from the viewing dock, Callie was sure to have seen her friend smile behind her surgical mask. She made sure to wave back as an acknowledgement.

Meredith knew Callie was coming to visit. And Meredith also knew why her friend is spending Christmas here in Seattle and not in New York. She can't wait to scrub out and wine in with Callie so she could give her a pep talk. She insisted that she stays with her and not in some hotel during her hiatus.

Of all the people in Seattle, Callie has stayed in contact with Meredith the most, they somehow bonded more during their time apart given that Zola and Sofia has facetimed each other everyday while playing one of their video games, thus giving them a chance to catch up as well, something she would have loved to do with Arizona but they always just end up asking how each other's day went and leaving the phone with Sof so she could catch up with her other parent.

She felt so connected with Meredith after her divorce, Derek's death and her move to New York. Although they are not as close as Mer and Cristina or her and Mark would ever be, she still considers her family, same goes with Meredith. Callie has been a sister to her all these years.

Her quiet bubble popped when she heard her phone buzz from her purse. She scrunched her nose in confusion.

It was from Arizona but the message apparently was sent by _Mommy_ from her phonebook.

**_Mommy: We're here at the daycare, Sofia wanted to see Zola and I figured you don't have a car to drive around so we're waiting and you're riding with us. Text me when your meeting's over so we could meet at the lobby. See you, Calliope._**

And she smiled. That is why she couldn't find Arizona's number from her phonebook a while ago, maybe Sofia changed her name cause she always uses Callie's phone to text and call her Mommy. She didn't mean to surprise her ex-wife today knowing how much the blue eyed blonde hated surprises but they were already at the airport and their cab was waiting and she couldn't find her number so she just gave up. She likes the new name on her phonebook though, so she's keeping it.

"**_Meeting got cancelled. I'm just watching Meredith's surgery. Ready for dinner? See you at the lobby *_**" she hasn't hit send yet. She was contemplating whether or not to put the kiss emoji at the end of her text. Would it send Arizona a wrong signal? Was it too much? _Ay dios mio Calliope, are you in highschool?_

"Torres!" She was meaning to delete the emoji at the end of her text message but instead she hit send after getting startled.

"Alex." She said under her breath.

"I see, you're excited to see me." Alex said before pulling her in for a hug. She rolled her eyes at him.

"Oh we're hugging now?" She muffled under his tight hug.

"We are. We missed seeing you around. Please tell me you're not just here for a visit, you're coming back right?"

"Nope. Just here for the holidays." She told him. His eyes quickly averted to her sloppy gauzed covered hand.

"Jesus, Callie what happened." He almost grabbed it but she quickly retreated and stepped back.

"Nothing. Just an accident."

"It's bleeding." Alex was quick to grab it back and inspected it.

"Shit." She tried to whisper after noticing that it was definitely bleeding through.

"Let's change the dressing—"

"I'll change it myself. Anyway, I have to go—"

"I'm off now, how about I change your dressing then let's grab dinner and a drink at Joe's? My treat." Alex suggested. Before Callie could answer, she heard her phone buzz. It was from Arizona and she couldn't help but smile at her response. No words, it was just a simple kiss emoji but her heart raced and she may have smiled big enough for Karev to notice.

"We can do that next time. Uhm, Arizona's waiting for me at the lobby, we're having dinner."

Alex smirked.

"With Sofia." Callie quickly added but his teasing smile just grew even bigger.

"And Carina." With that, Alex's face switched from his teasing smile to a big frown as if she told him a horrible joke.

"What? We're all adults here Alex. This should be normal."

"You sure you wanna get in between those two's conversations?"

"What do you mean?"

"Arizona and Carina could make saying hello to each other sound like they're having sex. Those two are a walking sex machine—Ouch!" Callie quickly smacked Alex on his forehead.

"Stop being a nosy brat, Karev! They won't do that in front of our daughter."

"Trust me, if you only knew how smitten that italian sex-goddess is with your ex-wife." Callie didn't answer instead she just raised her eyebrows at him.

"But I'm still on team Callie. Just so you know though, if I see Arizona spiral down again because of you, I might change my rule with regards to how I fight back with women." Instead of being taken aback, she appreciated Alex's words. And gave him a hug for a second time.

"Thanks for always having her back, Alex." She smiled at him.

"Anytime Callie, in a heartbeat. You didn't even have to ask." Alex gave his friend a wink before letting her go.

"Good luck with dinner." He tried to add but Callie was a quick walker.

...

After changing the dressing in her hand and silently wishing that Arizona wouldn't start asking questions about it, she walked through the hallways to meet her girls. _Her girls,_ she smiled at the idea and then frowned as she remembered Carina, Arizona's hot italian-sex-goddess girlfriend according to Karev, then she was reminded how she has no match against the beauty. She used to be like her, hot, confident, effortless, sexy, both men and women would go crazy just to get in her pants and she loved it, she loved the attention but now she couldn't even go out without having to take a deep breath and wish people would stop staring. She tried to brush off the insecurity that's eating her insides as she glanced around Grey-Sloan Memorial.

This hospital housed a lot of memories for her liking, every corner reminds her of a certain memory or a certain person. These are the hallways that witnessed how badass of a surgeon she was—still is, she hoped. Here she just passed through the room where she fixed George O'Malley's shoulder, she smiled at the thought of him. Sweet George, she holds him in her heart as her guardian angel along with Mark. And then she almost laughed after turning a corner where her dad slammed both George and Mark up against the wall, this is also where she officially introduced Arizona to her dad, she winced after being reminded how bad her argument with her Dad turned out. Thinking about it, she would still do the same thing and fight for her relationship with Arizona. With a smile never leaving her face now, she continued walking. Those are good memories.

Some of the nurses and doctors have greeted her causing her daydream to be disrupted and one of the intern, guessing with her light blue scrubs on, actually had the courage to walk up to her as if she was some kind of a celebrity.

"Dr. Torres, I'm Dr. Rivera a 2nd year resident, I just wanna tell you how much influence you have in my career, after your cartilage research, how you built it from scratch, and then your robotic limb, you've inspired me, I knew I wanna do as great as you're doing in this field. I just... I'm sorry. I— love you, you're amazing. Oh my gosh I didn't just say that out loud." A petite red haired green eyed intern, was blushing after saying all those kind words. With her high pitched voice and lack of confidence, she reminded her of Kepner mixed with a little bit of George when both were just starting out as interns. Time has really gone by so fast.

She smiled at the young woman. she appreciated every word she knew she needed to hear especially with what's going on in her life. It's times like these that makes her gain her confidence back and it amazes her that the younger generations of doctors have heard and are actually learning about her cartilage and the project she started with Derek.

"Dr. Rivera, right?" She asked the young woman who was shaking as she nodded.

"A-angela Rivera." The shy girl almost whispered.

"I'll make sure to remember that name and if by any chance you're interested in Ortho, I'll be glad take you under my wing." She saw how the intern almost lost her balance after hearing what Callie said. After exchanging gratitude, she continued her way to the lobby feeling great with a little ounce of her self-esteem back. _She could still be badass._

In the lobby sat Arizona with Sofia on her side, both are laughing and as Callie neared the two giggling women she found out why.

The mother and daughter tandem are eating what looked like pop rocks and Sofia is so amused by her Mommy's reaction. Arizona was like a five year old getting too excited every time a pink rock candy pops in her mouth.

"Candy before dinner huh? And here I wonder how you got into peds." Callie said breaking the duo's momentum.

"Mommy, you finished it all!" Sofia almost said in unison with her Mama.

"Cause you can't have candy before dinner so I'm saving you from Mama's icy glare." She whispered in her daughter's ear, causing the younger brunette to laugh.

"Hey, I heard that." Callie played along, seeing how the two could play a team against her. Arizona just laughed.

"Loosen up, Calliope." Arizona winked at her.

"Ready to go ladies?" Arizona asked both women, holding Sofia in her right hand, Sofia grabbed Callie's hand on the other. Both nodded in excitement.

"But where's Carina?" Callie stopped.

"She has a mother who's in labor and apparently her _golden technique_ isn't working so she has to stay til she could deliver. She'll follow us there."

"Golden technique?" Callie asked.

"Natural oxytocin. Trust me you wouldn't want me to go into details." She said motioning her head to Sofia.

"Oh... oh... that." She almost regret asking. Arizona nodded then she started walking, Callie noticed Arizona limping. She must have been really tired and must have gone through a lot today. She's fighting not to hold the blonde and help her. She knows how much Arizona hates it and the trouble that could cause her.

While waiting for their food, Callie and Arizona got preoccupied with Sofia's funny stories from school. The seven year old was beyond excited to have both parents seated for dinner. This was definitely a first as much as she could remember so she was extra playful and extra talkative.

Arizona was so amazed by her daughter's wit and sense of humor, she realized she's never seen Sofia like this during her stays with her. And then she watched Callie nod at their daughter's jokes and even share a banter with the little brunette. Callie must be used to this version of Sofia, as she was brushing off a hint of jealousy and sadness tugging in her heart, her eyes suddenly met Callie's who now has a questioning look. She must have been staring for too long.

Arizona was saved from her embarrassment when Callie's phone rang. She watched how the latina stared at the caller ID and paled, her once flushed face that she got from laughing too hard at Sofia's jokes was gone in an instant, she immediately stood up and grabbed her phone, said she will be back right before she pivoted her way out of the restaurant. Arizona fought hard not to follow behind Callie.

Arizona's attention went from Callie to Sofia who was now staring at her Mother from outside of the restaurant's window. Although they couldn't hear her, Arizona and Sofia knew that the tall brunette was shouting at whoever's on the phone.

"Hey sweetheart, is everything alright?" She knew she shouldn't be asking this question. She had a deal with Callie that they would never use Sofia to tell on them if they wanna know what's going on with each other's life. But she was just worried at how her daughter suddenly fell silent after Callie went to take the call.

"I just wish Mama's happy again." The seven year old whispered.

"Oh Sofia, I'm pretty sure Mama is—"

"No. Penny—"

Sofia suddenly shut her mouth after seeing her Mama enter the restaurant.

_Penny? Penny what?_ Something's going on and Arizona could feel it, and Sofia knows something but she's— they are hiding it from her. After a good 5 minutes or so, Callie came back, this time her cheeks and ears were red and her eyes were wetter than they were, almost as if she was trying her best not to break down in front of her.

"Are you okay, Calliope?" She asked but the latina didn't answer, instead she just sat down, took a deep breath and put her phone in the back of her purse as if she never wants to see it again. She just felt a burning blue eyes still staring at her and realized that Arizona was waiting for an answer.

"What was that? I'm sorry." She said under her breath.

"I was asking if you were okay. Are you okay? Do you wanna talk about it?"

"I am okay, I'm fine." She lied "and no, I don't wanna talk about it... now now." She said subtly pointing her head towards Sofia hoping Arizona would get what she meant. The blonde nodded in agreement.

"But we will talk about it?" Arizona insisted.

"We will, we should—" she wasn't even done talking when Arizona's phone started ringing as well. Panic rushed through Callie's veins as she tried to check the caller ID from Arizona's phone. Arizona's now more worried than ever with how Callie is reacting.

"Don't! I mean, uhm, who is it?" Callie quickly asked.

"It's Carina... Callie are you sure you're okay?" Arizona answered this time her voice was higher.

"I-I am. I'm sorry. Go ahead answer the call." She said now that she's calmed down. Arizona's eyes never left Callie's even as she answered Carina's call.

"_Tesoro_" Callie heard the italian's endearment for Arizona. Having learned a little Italian growing up, she knew that it meant 'treasure'. Arizona Robbins, her once treasure, is now Carina's treasure too.

_How sweet_. She almost gagged.

"I can't join dinner tonight, this is taking too long as I expected." Carina said over the phone.

"Oh. Okay. Do you need me there? I can help—" Arizona asked her girlfriend now breaking her stare from Callie.

"No, I'm not taking your time away from Sofia, I know how much you missed her." Arizona smiled, grateful for Carina, she really is.

"Thank you. How about we bring you dinner?."

"No, I'm good, I'll just grab whatever later. Can I have bambolina on the phone? I know I promised her ice cream." Carina said. Arizona put the call on speaker for Sofia as if it's not enough that they could already hear Carina on the other line.

"Sofia, I can't be at dinner tonight but we'll have the ice cream tomorrow okay? We'll have the strawberry gelato down the corner at Mommy's place and I also found a new museum you would love."

"Yaay! Okay, see you tomorrow." Sofia excitedly said, sending her back to her upbeat mood. During their short meeting while Sofia was in Seattle a few months back, her and Carina grew very close they sometimes even gang up against Arizona. Carina was surprisingly good with kids, despite Sofia's Seattle tantrums, she still won her heart.

Callie watched her daughter's exchange with Carina and was secretly glad that at least she was getting along with Arizona's girlfriend despite her own emotions playing inside her head. She was jealous, but she wouldn't admit it, not because of pride but because she knows what her place is in Arizona's life now. And after all that she's caused her ex-wife, she will not be in her way to getting the happiness Arizona truly deserves. But right now this was just too much to handle.

"Now can you give the phone back to Mommy?" Callie's thoughts were wiped out after hearing Arizona's girlfriend. Unknown to Carina that she was still on speaker she started teasing the blonde.

"Arizona, I will crash at your place tonight, you better be up when I get home, I'll still give your leg the massage as promised, we will use your natural oxytocin—"

"Carina—"Arizona tried to stop her lover.

"I'll touch you in all pl—" she quickly grabbed the phone from Sofia to turn the speaker off right in time.

"You were on speaker!" She tried to control her laughter.

Her eyes are smiling. Arizona's happy. She makes her happy.

"Oh my gosh did Sofia hear me? I'm so sorry." She heard the brunette on the other line laughing.

"I'll see you later." Arizona said.

"Don't have too much fun at dinner without me. I love you." Carina said.

"Hmmn... you too" Arizona internally smacked her head, she shares something really wonderful with Carina but she just couldn't say it back, love is such a strong word and she just doesn't share it with anyone, _but that's Carina! _

She silenced her head when her gaze fell on Callie who was now obviously uncomfortable in her seat.

Their silence was broken down when Sofia started talking.

"Why would Auntie Carina give you a massage? Does your leg hurt Mommy?" She almost choked. She will make sure to have a word with Carina later.

"Uhm yeah, Mommy's leg does hurt. Would you give me a massage too?" She tried veering the subject a little.

"Mama's good at massage. She said she's the best at it, right Mama?" She smiled at her mother who smiled back at her.

"Oh but you can't give Mommy a massage yet cause your hand's still broken." Sofia added before giving her mother a chance to answer.

Arizona followed Sofia's attention on Callie's hand and worry over powered the awkwardness they shared a while back. Callie tried to hide her hand under the table but Arizona was quick to grab it. Having missed Arizona's hand against hers, she just let it. It only took seconds before the blonde let go of her hold.

"What happened with your hand Calliope?" It wasn't just a question, it was like an order for Callie to answer.

It was so easy to lie to everyone but lying to Arizona felt almost impossible. Cat got her tongue and she couldn't even say the word.

"A-uhm-Accident." She managed to whisper.

"Lie!" Sofia whispered back to her Mother and frowned at her, a frown that Arizona's definitely used to. This was the Seattle version of Sofia. Callie stared at the seven year old who was definitely acting older than she should be.

"Mija." She tried to stop her daughter, she knew she was being a bad mother right now.

Arizona watched the exchange and cleared her throat. She knew Callie was lying. Callie is a bad liar.

"Calliope—"

"Food's here!" Callie cut Arizona who was now turning red. She's mad. Callie knows.

After their server placed all their orders on their table and made sure he got everything right, he left their table, he, too, felt the thick air between the two women.

Callie cleared her throat. She was sorry, damn, she's been sorry ever since the day she left Seattle, she wanted to explain everything to Arizona but she doesn't have the courage yet, not while Sofia's listening.

Callie reached for Arizona's hand. Both women felt bolts of energy rushed through their veins with that simple touch, Arizona didn't mean to flinch and pull her hand away but she still did after feeling the spark, Callie's touch still has the same effect on her and it scared her. It caused Callie to flush in embarrassment as she took the other woman's reaction wrong.

"I-I'm sorry, Arizona. Let's just... let's just at least enjoy dinner for now." Callie almost choked with each word, still trying to smile for Sofia. Unknown to both women that her ounce of confidence left were now shattered into tiny pieces.

She held her daughter's hand and kissed her forehead. Sofia, her saving grace, the strength she always needed,

but why? Why was her heart still hurting?

_You deserve this_. The voice in her head won.

This will definitely be a long night for Calliope Torres.


	4. Four

**A/N: I really don't like putting this. I wish I could just reply to every comment ****from the last update but I figured it doesn't give me that option. You may hate the characters now and the idea of how and where things are going but I still wish you'd trust me on this or if you really think this is a really bad story and decided to not read it anymore, I won't blame you and I won't argue. LOL. To each his own and I respect your opinion. And to answer some comments about Carina, although she really is pretty and I loved her addition on the show, I agree and I don't think Carina's hotter than Callie BUT the Callie in my story does. See the difference there? And about Penny, I actually never hated her in the show. I always thought people were unfair to her and she was judged wrong. Just sharing, LOL. Anyway, This is a CALZONA fan fic I'm leaving it there.**

**PS. This was supposed to be a longer chapter but I cut it into 2 parts. Next chapter will be uploaded maybe next week. Thanks for all the comments. Keep them coming! Here's Chapter 4 ️ **

Arizona insisted to drop Callie off of at Meredith's after dinner instead of the latina taking a cab, but seeing how Sofia's passed out after a long day, Callie just suggested they go straight at Arizona's and have Meredith pick her up there since it's near the hospital and Mer's shift will be over soon.

Neither was talking on their drive back at Arizona's. The blonde decided to just stay quiet and calm herself before she starts saying things that would only lead to a fight with Callie.

She was disappointed and hurt, Callie lying is already one thing but having Sofia keep secrets? It was something that's making her really furious than she should have.

She tries her hardest to avoid any eye contact with Callie but her eyes instantly fell at Callie's hand, the then white gauze is now almost soaked in blood.

"Callie! Callie your hand's bleeding." She said breaking the silence, her being pissed almost gone in the air, suddenly the doctor in her kicked in.

"I'm okay. Just keep driving Arizona. I'll fix it at Meredith's." She wanted Arizona to focus on the road. She saw how the blonde took a double look, her jaw clenched and continued their quiet ride home.

Seeing how Arizona's having trouble walking now with her worsening limp, Callie insisted to carry Sofia up to her room. Arizona didn't argue and just directed the latina to where Sofia's room is. She needed time alone anyway before striking another conversation with Callie.

The moment Sofia hit the bed, the little brunette shifted and held her mother's arm tightly. She slowly opened her eyes.

"Will I see you tomorrow, Mama?" Her sweet voice filled the quiet room.

"I'll see, Mija. Mama has conference for three days, I'll try to visit dinner time okay? If I couldn't make it, I promise to call." The little brunette nodded at her mama.

"I'm happy to have dinner with you and Mommy tonight. Thank you for saying yes."

"Oh, Sofia." She climbed the bed to hug her daughter.

"Mama, why don't you tell Mommy what Penny did? Lying is bad right?" Sometimes she thinks this kid is older than her age.

"Sofia what did I tell you about Penny?"

"That she's a good person." Sofia whispered. Last thing Callie needs is a daughter filled with so much hatred in her heart.

"She is Sof. And yes, lying is bad so don't do it okay? It will not only make Mama sad but Mommy will be really furious too and we both don't want that, do we?" Her daughter quickly shook her head.

"Mommy's quiet. You made her mad." Sofia told her Mama.

"I think I did, can you go back to sleep now so I can make Mommy un-mad?" She sweetly asked her daughter. Sofia giggled and nodded.

"Mommy said my kiss attacks makes her feel better every time she's upset. Maybe you should give her that." Sofia shared.

"Kiss attacks? I love those too but I don't think she'll like the ones coming from me, babe." Callie chuckled. Sofia just shrugged her shoulders and tried to close her eyes.

"Are you staying at Auntie Mer's?" Her daughter said after a few seconds of trying, still with no plans of sleeping.

Callie sighed and faced her daughter, her hand resting on her head to get a better view of Sofia while the finger on her injured hand soothingly ran over her daughter's nose and forehead, knowing that's the only way to put Sofia to sleep.

"I am." Callie answered calmly.

"Can you give her a hug for me?" She whispered.

"Sure Sof. That's sweet of you. Tell me what's this hug for?" Callie asked curious of the little brunette's request.

"I was with Zola earlier and she told me that Auntie Mer cries at night every time she misses Uncle Derek."

"Oh... okay... I will give your Auntie a hug for sure." She said rubbing her daughter's hair.

"Do you cry when you miss Daddy, Mama?" Sofia added. Callie took a deep breath.

"I do, Sofia. And it's normal to cry when you miss someone so much and you can't be with them. Your Daddy is my best friend and I would do everything, anything just to spend one more day with him so I could hug him and tell him how amazing and beautiful his little princess is." She smiled at the now sleepy Sofia.

"I miss Daddy too. But I don't remember him." It made Callie's heart rip into tiny pieces hearing that from her daughter. Her innocent child. If only she could shield her from all the heartaches.

"How about you go to sleep then maybe tomorrow or the day after tomorrow we could talk about Daddy and maybe we could ask Mommy too if she has videos of us four when you were little?" Sofia excitedly nodded. She loved watching those videos and hearing the voice of Mark.

"Mama." Sofia still wasn't done talking.

"Okay, Mija, you really need to sleep now—"

"Do you cry when you miss Mommy too?" And then suddenly Callie was quiet. Little brown eyes that look exactly like hers stared right through her soul.

"I do Sof. Every time." This time Callie's not lying.

"Is that why you were crying last night and the other night too?"

"Baby..." she didn't think Sofia have seen all the nights she was crying in the balcony, she made sure both Penny and Sofia were asleep—

"I always see you go out of your room at night, you go out and you just cry. Do you miss Mommy that much? Or is it Daddy?" Callie was trying to control her tears but she just couldn't right now. Sofia saw her Mother's tears and quickly wiped it with her own hands.

"I'm sorry, Sof." Because she really was. She didn't want her daughter to see her like this. Has she put her through so much?

"We're here now Mama. We're with Mommy now. She won't let the monsters hurt you. That's what she always promise me." Callie smiled at her.

"She won't." She assured her daughter.

"I pray to have more dinners with you and Mommy for the rest of my life. Good night, Mama." And then Sofia dozed off to sleep leaving the older brunette in tears without knowing that a certain blue eyed blonde was listening throughout their conversation.

After she was sure that Sofia is already fast asleep, Callie found her way down at Arizona's living room. She decided that she would just wait here for Meredith.

Not that she was surprised cause she also has their photos on display in her house back in New York, Callie was really glad to see all their family photos on Arizona's wall. She checked what she could and reminisced through all the memories behind each one of them. Wandering in her own thoughts she got a little bit startled when she saw Arizona standing at the kitchen counter.

"You should rest, Arizona. Meredith will be here in an hour. Actually, how far is it if I just walk from here to the hospital? Or should I just take a cab? I don't wanna keep you up any longer."

"Sit."

"I'm sorry?"

"Just sit, Calliope!" That was it, that was the tone Callie was always afraid of, it only meant that the blonde is pissed beyond her limit, Callie quickly checked if Arizona's under the influence of alcohol but seeing that her hands and the kitchen counter were clear she shuffled towards her upon command and took a seat in front of Arizona.

When Callie was seated, Arizona reached to get Callie's injured hand to take a look but upon doing so Callie closed her eyes and flinched away, as if she was anticipating something else. Callie's hand started to shake. This was the red flag for Arizona. Something definitely was wrong.

"Did you seriously think I was gonna hit you, Callie?" She almost broke down.

Callie calmed down a bit, she shook her head to answer. _Lie_.

"What the hell happened in New York?" Arizona almost begged. She wasn't used to this version of Callie. She seemed scared and fragile. She gave up when Callie didn't answer, she focused on her priority right now which was Callie's hand. They can do the talking later.

It was a big cut, a deep one too that needed at least 6-7 stitches, instead there were only three so there were still some open areas. By the looks of how it was closed, Arizona was sure that Callie did them herself.

"Jesus Christ, Callie." Arizona couldn't believe it.

"I-I ran out of thread." She explained. "I was running out of time too, we needed to be at the airport so I just did what I could—"

"Why didn't you say anything? You're a fucking surgeon Callie, you should've known better!" Arizona noticed her voice was raising so she calmed herself before speaking again.

"You've been at the hospital the whole day and you didn't even do anything about it? What if we can't save it? What if— Can you even make a fist?" She assessed despite being so worried. When Callie shook her head no, Arizona quickly stood up and grabbed what looks like a huge first aid box. Of course she has a suture kit in her box.

She pulled the kit out and removed the gauze off of Callie's hand and started to clean the cut.

"It's fine Arizona, Meredith can do it, she was gonna do it—"

"I can do it too Calliope! I am a god damn surgeon too!"

_I know, and a good one too. I just didn't wanna bother you, I've bothered you enough_. But Callie just remained quiet. She noticed tears in Arizona's eyes. _And I've hurt you enough too._

"I'm sorry." She whispered. How many times will she say sorry?

"This is gonna hurt." Arizona whispered back. She doesn't even know why she's crying. She's been sensing something was off with Callie and it pains her to see her ex-wife like this but it pains her even more that Callie doesn't seem to trust her, that she's trusting Meredith more than her.

When she was sure her eyes are clear from the tears, Arizona positioned Callie's arm so she could get a better view on the area she was going to close, the cut was near Callie's right knuckle, her dominant hand, making it impossible for her to perform surgery for a while.

Only having a topical anesthesia available, both surgeons knew that this was gonna hurt but Callie's hand has already been numb with pain since she had this cut this morning so when Arizona started closing, she barely even felt it, not until the third suture, it was not that bad but Callie couldn't hold her emotions anymore.

Without saying any words, she just cried. She cried everything she's been feeling that's been locked up for 2 years. Arizona remained quiet, fighting her own tears back.

God knows how much she wanted to hug Callie right now. What has Penny done? How did Callie end up like this. It's like, she's not Callie anymore.

"Almost done. Almost." She tells Callie although it was more for herself.

"Did Penny do this?" Arizona calmed herself, she just wanted answers.

"I know it should be none of my business but when I found out that my daughter knew something and she was really scared to tell me, which by the way makes me really, really mad, Callie, this has become my business too, so tell me, did Penny do this?" She's trying to lower her voice now. Her being mad just makes it more impossible for Callie to speak up.

When Callie nodded her head, Arizona has muttered thousands of curses under her breath.

"Did she hurt Sofia too?"

"No, I will never let that happen and she will never hurt Sofia—"

"Callie we need to call the police, we need to report —"

"No! No Arizona. You can't do that. No, please no."

"Are you—Are you defending her right now?"

"I'm not! Arizona, you don't understand. I can't. We can't tell the police. Just—just trust me please." Callie begged.

"Then tell me what happened!"

"It was an accident Arizona!" Callie raised her voice to prove a point.

"Stop saying it was an accident because Sofia was telling me otherwise—"

"What did she tell you?"

"I don't know Callie! What was she supposed to tell me? Our daughter is keeping your secret for you!"

"It was an accident. We were cooking breakfast, and then we started fighting. I said things and made her really mad, it was my fault, she didn't mean to hit my hand with the knife. My hand was bleeding so bad I was trying to stop it and she was crying, she was saying sorry, that was what Sofia saw—no, no, Sofia didn't see anything, she just—she just heard Penny saying sorry so Sofia thinks Penny did this on purpose." Callie explained only saying half the truth.

"Stop it Callie. Stop right there."

"Arizona—"

"No Callie. Stop. I don't know why but I feel like you're making up stories just to save Penny from this. Who are you right now? Why—" Arizona can't even finish her sentence.

"Why do you keep choosing her over us?" She finally uttered.

"I'm not choosing her—"

"I've spent days feeding my guilt, wondering if I ever was a good parent for Sofia, that me, giving Sofia back to you was the best thing for her although it was too painful for me. But now you're making me regret my decisions."

"I'm sorry Arizona. Just listen to me please, there—there's something else you need to know—"

"Oh there's something else? Is it another lie to cover Penny?" When Callie took her gaze off of Arizona, the blonde confirmed that Callie was not being true.

"See? You can't even look at me! Look at me Callie! Look straight in my eye and tell me you're only saying nothing but the truth." Callie took a deep breath, her eyes remained on the floor. She can't do what the blonde was asking her to do. Although it was wrong, Callie felt all her guards up again. Doubts and fears suddenly filled her head. She couldn't do it. She hates that she still couldn't say what she's supposed to be saying.

Arizona shook her head.

"How can I even trust you right now?— Oh wait... Who am I to talk about trust right?" Arizona said almost laughing but she didn't get anything from Callie.

For the first time Arizona wished Callie has something to say. She wished Callie would fight back, that she would argue just to defend her point like the old Callie always does but she didn't. Callie didn't answer, she just stayed silent.

Both their attention went to Callie's phone ringing, caller ID says Meredith, meaning she's already outside waiting. She knew. Arizona knew how close Callie and Meredith grew, she's glad to know that Callie didn't completely leave her life in Seattle, she just hoped she was still part of that life.

Arizona reached to hold Callie's cheeks and wipe the tears that has been falling non-stop.

"I am so angry and so disappointed and hurt, really hurt— but I still can't hate you right now. Not ever... not even a little bit." She whispered, kissing the latina's temple.

"When you're done being scared... when you're done hiding your truth, I wish you would realize that you have more people than Meredith who's willing to understand." Callie just nodded. Arizona put her hand to where Callie's heart lies and whispered something that made the latina break down even more—

"I know _she's_ still here somewhere.

I miss _her_, Calliope."


	5. Five

5

_Flashback_

_It was a sunny afternoon, it's almost summer in New York and the heat it's bringing is no joke. Living here in the big apple for more than a year, she realized how much she actually loved the rain in Seattle and the June gloom it brings. She used to hate those but that's how the irony of life works, the worse things she hated are the ones that she now miss the most. _

_With a 96 degree weather outside that feels like a hundred, Callie was still surprisingly in a good mood. _

_Well, she would be because 3 nights ago she fetched her precious daughter at the airport after receiving a call from Arizona that it would be best for Sofia to just have one school and that she doesn't need to go back and forth in Seattle just to fulfill their settlement in court._

_Arizona shared how Sofia had been, the whole time she was with her and how she felt as if she was Rapunzel's bad step-mother after their daughter boldly told her that she hated her. _

_"Arizona, you know that's not true right? Sofia loves you but she can be really hard headed. I don't know, maybe she got that from Mark." Callie remembered telling her ex-wife, trying to lighten up Arizona's mood although both women know how Sofia is a little Calliope in every way. _

_Arizona has forced Sofia into her school in Seattle but failed after receiving phone calls after phone calls with the Principal. Now even if school year's almost over, she's decided to send Sofia back to Callie. It may seem to not make sense but after trying all her power to cheer her little girl up, it's just not working and Sofia's hatred just grows bigger and bigger every day so she was left with no choice._

_The last blow was when she was called to get Sofia after fighting with a kid in the school's playground as if stealing money wasn't enough for her, Sofia ended up with a bruise and a scratch on her elbow that day. It broke Arizona's heart into million pieces. She knew she needed to do something. _

_Arizona explained to Calliope that this is not her giving up with Sofia. She just didn't want to further damage their kid by forcing her into something she doesn't want. Callie understood her point despite thinking how late it is for Sofia to move back to her school here in New York. _

_She almost choked in her own tears hearing Arizona cry on the other line, it was the first time after a very long time that they talked for hours and she didn't want it to be like this._

_So they agreed, she'll have Sofia during the school months and Arizona would get her every summer, except this coming summer, obviously. With their schedules changing big time, Callie promised that Arizona would have Sofia during Christmas and New Year and she also invited the blonde over to New York to come visit Sofia anytime. It's the least thing she could do for her ex-wife._

_Callie also promised to talk to Sofia and show her the repercussions of her actions. Arizona asked her to just be gentle with the kid and understand where she is coming from. _

_This is how their parenting style differs from the other. Callie doesn't coddle. Callie rewards the good but punishes the bad. She's the one to give Sofia time outs and death stares in public. Arizona, on the other hand, is the coddler. The -I'll give you everything you want- kind of mother. She's the one to bring Sofia to the mall almost every day, treat her to the grandest movie dates and enroll her to dance lessons, singing lessons, campings and all such which Callie doesn't see much of an issue between them, she has her own way of spoiling her princess anyway. She think that's how they balance, it's just funny cause they always thought it would be the other way around. _

_After Callie said her thank you to Arizona for the thousanth time she remembers hanging up the phone that night and thought that all these, the distance and their time being apart, would be over soon. _

_"Penny! I got my recorder today!" Sofia excitedly showed the red head who just entered their apartment._

_"Good. How was school sweetheart?" Penny said masking the disappointment she had at work today. _

_Penny has grown to love Sofia's presence because without her, her and Callie always just end up in an ugly argument._

_"It was goooood! I missed everybody!" Sofia answered with a glimmer in her eyes, but then her mood changed... "I just wish Mommy's here." The little latina shared innocently without knowing how that could piss the woman in an instant. Penny leaned in to hug her, trying so hard not to show her disappointment._

_"Well, you would still be with Mommy if you behaved in Seattle..." Callie, who was listening in the kitchen adjacent to the living room, heard Sofia's comment. She raised her eyebrows at her daughter who just rolled her eyes on her. It's her antics as such that wanna make Callie laugh at times, if not with the obvious bruise on the little feisty latina's face, she would have let her get away with one eyeroll, but then she was reminded of all her daughter's acts in Seattle so she thought otherwise._

_"Sofia Robbins, you did not just roll your eyes at me!" She raised her voice._

_"Sorry Mama." The little girl quickly retreated. Callie already had a talk with Sofia regarding her behavior in Seattle, she let the little girl know that none of those made her proud as her Mama and because of that she gets to bed an hour early for the whole month and she has set up strict screen time meaning she only have an hour of TV or cellphone or computer a day. _

_"But Seattle's not fun without you, Mama." Sofia whispered, she had been arguing but Callie won't let her get her way. With one raise of an eyebrow, the little latina know how her Mama could put her into place._

_"Like how New York's not as fun without Mommy." She added and went back to focus on making music, or rather noise, with her new instrument._

_Callie chose not to answer her daughter on that one. She just took a deep breath and lay her attention to the woman who was quietly listening to their mother and daughter banter._

_"Hey hot shot." Callie turned to her girlfriend, shaking her head after Sofia's comment. _

_Penny made her way to the kitchen to set her stuff over the counter and studied the latina in front of her. Callie, in her good mood, went up to kiss her girlfriend but Penny just avoided her lips and offered her cheek instead. _

_Callie has been noticing her girlfriend being cold for days now, maybe even weeks. She hasn't counted but they've been arguing over tiny stuff and it has become exhausting. _

_Thankfully though, Penny brightened a little having Sofia around the past 2 days. There was still definitely less talking but it was less fighting too so the ortho surgeon think that's good enough._

_"Hey. What's the matter?" Callie tried asking for the nth time even if she knows she will never get an answer out of Penny. She was trying to catch her eye to get her sole attention but the lady has been putting up her wall so high, Callie doesn't even know why it was built in the first place. _

_"Are you seriously just wearing your underwear in front of your daughter? God, Callie, the whole neighborhood can see you." Penny switched the topic and pointed at the large window that was open. Callie rolled her eyes, Sofia did pick up a lot from her Momma._

_"Here she goes again picking on tiny stuff obviously just to start a fight." She whispered enough for her girlfriend to hear._

_ "What did you just say?" Penny raised her voice. _

_Callie laughed, she was thankful that Sofia was loud and busy enough as she practice her new recorder so she could talk without her hearing._

_"Okay Debbie Downer. First, this is not my underwear, I'm wearing my shorts cause it's freaking burning in this city and second, it's not my problem if people stare at my butt and my boobs. It's theirs and their perverted minds." Callie made a point motioning her hand through her body, still trying to keep her mood up. _

_She was not on call today so she wore her comfiest outfit without actually bothering to look good. She was wearing a blue tank top without her bra and a pink boy short that hugged her glorious behind, showing her toned body perfectly. She put her hair up in a bun but there are still baby hairs touching her face and her neck. This was her lazy look during her days off and this was also the look that could drive her women crazy, a certain blue eyed pediatric surgeon in particular, and even Penny before but now Penny was acting a different kind of crazy._

_"So Debbie, how about you take a shower and I give you a massage after dinner? Maybe we could do a little something something too when the little rugrat goes to sleep." Callie jokes as she tries to flirt just to lighten up the mood. She has been doing this every night to get a score from Penny but instead she gets turned down and it really frustrates her. Callie loves sex and she's proud of it and not having one for weeks is a killer for her._

_"Debbie Downer?"__ Penny asked._

_"That or Negative Nancy. Your call, Penny." Callie joked but it didn't help the situation, if not it actually just worsened Penny's mood. _

_Penny was gonna say something __but she was interrupted with Sofia's loud flute, the poor kid has been making bad sounds since she's arrived. _

_"God damn it! Sofia will you lower that down please?!" Penny shouted at the little brunette which shocked all three of them. Penny never raises her voice at Sofia. This was Callie's turning point. _

_"Hey!" Callie called Penny out and went straight to her daughter before her mouth blows up. _

_"Mija, can you practice in your room please? I'll just call you when dinner's ready." She sweetly ran her fingers through her daughter's hair and gave her a kiss on her forehead, the kid was obviously shocked and it might have scared her a little that she didn't even give a fight and just skidded her way to her room. _

_When she was sure that Sofia was safely inside, she turned to the red head who now has tears in her eyes. Great! Now she gets to cry?_

_"What was that Penny? What was that?! Were you having a bad day at work so you just decide to storm in here and be cranky at everyone? Jeez, it's like I have two children! Your mood swings lately are horrible, even worse than Sofia's!" Her voice certainly a little higher than it was before but still not loud enough so Sofia wouldn't hear them._

_"She was loud, we were talking!" _

_"She was loud? She has been practicing before you came in and start picking a fight!"_

_"Picking a fight? What, so I can't scold our daughter?" Did she hear her right?_

_"OUR daughter? Penny, last time I checked, she is MY daughter and if you have a problem with her you go through it with ME because I AM her mother, NOT YOU!" Callie explained trying to remind Penny her rules with regards Sofia and her discipline with her kid._

_"I'm not her mother but Arizona is? Explain to me how we're different in terms of relationship, Callie?"_

_"She has—"_

_"The custody?! She's on papers? Just those Callie? If I'm not a mother to Sofia then Arizona's not far different too! She WAS your girlfriend when you had Sofia just as much as I AM your girlfriend now!"_

_"We are not fighting about this right now." Callie laughed as if she was hearing some non sense stupid joke and went back to check the dinner she was making. She was fire red meaning she is fuming mad, add in a few spanish curses she's been whispering under her breath, then it means she's gonna blow anytime soon. _

_"Oh you don't wanna talk about Arizona? Why wouldn't we? Haven't you forced me enough to move back to Seattle for months now?" Penny said adding yet another fire to the flame. _

_"Because it's the best for Sofia! And I am not forcing you to come with us!"_

_"For Sofia, huh? Then why did YOUR Arizona sent her back? Why? Because she couldn't handle—"_

_That was enough to provoke the brunette. _

_"You want me to tell you the difference between you and Arizona? She cares, Penny! She cares for Sofia, she sacrifices for Sofia. She sent Sofia here because I am here, thinking that could make Sofia really happy but you know what I didn't tell her when she was crying and questioning herself as a mother? I didn't tell her that Sofia's as broken too here in New York because her Mommy's not here. That the only way to bring Sofia back is to have both her parents in the same city, no more months long of not seeing her Mommy or her Mama. I didn't tell her that because I was too god damned coward to admit that moving here with you was a huge HUGE mistake!" __Callie swore she heard a flat line in her ear when Penny slapped her. _

_Her whole body was woken up with fear. This was the first time Penny's gone physical. She stepped back and ran straight towards their bedroom but she was attacked yet again with a fuming red head. _

_"You don't get to blame me for that Callie! I never forced you to move here with me. I never forced you to move to New York. This was all you!" she said after slamming the door. All Callie could think of right now is how she would explain everything to Sofia, though impossible she was silently praying that she's not hearing their conversation. _

_"What are you doing? Are you leaving me? Are you moving back to Seattle?" Penny panicked when she saw Callie put pants and a shirt on then grab a luggage and starts putting her clothes inside._

_"Do you seriously think Arizona would just accept you back? After everything you put her through, do you think she would like you back? No Callie! No! She hates you cause you ruined her!" That was enough for Callie to turn around._

_"You can stop now, Penny." Her voice quiet, she was trying to control her emotions knowing well enough how she could start saying things she would regret telling her girlfriend if she didn't. Girlfriend? She doesn't even know who this woman is in front her right now. She doesn't sound like Penny, this isn't Penny. This is a monster. _

_"Stop? No! I get to say when to stop, Callie! You ruined Arizona and now you're ruining me too!" _

_"I'm ruining you? How am I—"_

_"They fired me today. They fired me because you couldn't keep your mouth shut!" Penny finally blurted out. Callie wasn't prepared for the news. _

_"They... they did?" Callie almost went to console the woman in front of her but the red head shoved her hand away._

_"They did! Are you happy now? I'm finally out of your way, you can now freely flirt with those nurses and PTs in that fucking hospital."_

_"What are you talking about?" _

_"I know Callie! People talk! People saw you go inside the on call room and your scrub nurse follows you."_

_"To sleep, Penny! To fucking sleep because I can't even come home to this apartment without you barging in and starting a fight! Now you're accusing me of cheating too? Me? Cheating? Haha you're funny!" _

_"Callie you couldn't even have my back. You can't even fight for me. I should've known better—"_

_"They have protocols!!!" Callie fought back._

_"I'm your fucking girlfriend!" Penny cried as she throws the first thing she could grab in hand which was a remote control and smashed it to the wall. Callie shrieked as she hears the destroying sound of the crash. And took a step away to study Penny._

_In their new work place, Penny tried to save a patient through surgery against the hospital's policy but she went beyond it and did what she thought was best to save the patient's life. Callie was one of the people who told her to wait another day but she still went through it, as a concerned girlfriend, Callie went to discuss the matter to their chief, not to tell on Penny but to help cover her butt, forgetting she wasn't on Grey-Sloan Memorial Hospital. She couldn't trust this people yet. Obviously it was a wrong decision what she did, having Penny fired._

_Wait... she thought to herself. It wasn't her fault. They will know anyway. Why is she blaming her for it?_

_"He lived. I thought he was gonna be another Derek Shepherd but he lived. I saved him but I still got fired?! What fucking system do we have? Where do I stand? Why do people hate me either way? And you want me to move back to Seattle? How selfish are you Calliope?" _

_Callie remained silent and continued to watch as Penny's emotions shift from one to another. Her concern is growing and the doctor in her start to kick in. This isn't normal. She wanted to stay but the mother in her knew that she shouldn't. This environment is not healthy for Sofia, so she went and continued her way to their door, with a luggage in one hand._

_"Callie! Callie please don't leave. Please. I'm sorry for everything I said, for everything I did. I'll say sorry to Sofia too. I'll do better. Please. Please Callie, I can't lose you too." _

_-END OF FLASHBACK-_

"That bitch." Meredith commented after her friend told her the first time Penny ever lay a hand on her. Callie gave her a glare.

"What? You know I hate her ever since—"

"You hate her cause you're blaming her for something she didn't do." Callie explained.

"Heck yeah. I'm blaming her for something SHE DIDN'T do." A drunk Meredith rebutted causing a drunk brunette to shake her head.

"Hey! No judgments remember?! I need you to be my person tonight. I'm Meredith and you're my Cristina so you will just listen and not talk shit." Callie reminded her friend. She was gonna suggest for Meredith to be her Mark but that would include a lot of sexual comments which she would find cringe-worthy to hear from Meredith so she just asked for a Cristina. Besides, she could use a little dark and twisted in her situation.

"Oh trust me, I'm on my best Cristina right now. You should know, she was your roommate for god knows how long." Meredith explained to which Callie agreed.

"Besides why are you still taking her side? We get it, she used to be perfect Penny but she isn't anymore so... fuck her." Callie figured Meredith still hates the red head. All those times, she was just trying to be civil with her.

"She isn't perfect Penny anymore... oh God... I did break her Mer." Callie drawled after chugging almost half of the bottle in her hand.

"You didn't. So what happened after you left? How did you last months with that woman? You should have just moved back here!"

"We spent the night in a hotel, me and Sofia. That was the plan, I was gonna buy us a ticket and just fly back here but then I realized how complicated our situation is. I can't just jump on the plane and leave my life in New York like I did in Seattle. I signed a two year contract with the hospital and seeing how they're after money, those imbeciles would just eat half of my bank account if they sue me."

"Wait, so you lived in a hotel for the whole 6 months?"

"No... the next day I dropped Sofia to school, I received a phone call, Penny overdosed and was rushed in the hospital. I blamed myself for that. I knew she had the tendency. I saw the red flags but I still left. If she had died that day I would forever hold her in my conscience, my guilt would eat me alive. That was the last time I left her... til today happened. She wouldn't kill herself would she? Oh shit, what if she would!? Meredith I have to go back—"

"No one's going back! You're staying here! She stabbed you with a knife!"

"She didn't stab me. She was gonna hurt herself—"

"And you stupidly thought it's the brightest idea to use your hand as a shield? Badass Torres who?"

"She needs help, Mer. Her losing her job and the grant for her research triggered whatever she's going through right now. I'm tired of compromising. I'm tired of being her cushion, I'm tired of absorbing everything. Sofia, my daughter, she needs me too but right now I feel so fucking empty Mer." Callie just cried. Meredith, who admittedly said she was not a hugger, enveloped the crying latina in her body to console her friend.

"What if she's right? What if I actually destroy the people I love? Meredith I tell people that you don't destroy the people you love but I did. I-I destroyed them." Callie kept talking. She sat straight and rested her back on the couch behind her, they were in Meredith's living room. It was dark and they just left a candle and a light open enough to illuminate their spot. She knew that she's gonna regret drinking this late with an early conference she have the next morning.

"Oh Jesus, I destroyed George, didn't I?" Callie said after their long silence as if she just found a missing puzzle piece. She cried enough for the whole day that her tears weren't falling anymore.

"You didn't destroy George." Meredith rolled her eyes at her friend.

"I did! I was too jealous of your friendship and Izzie that I questioned his love for me enough to force him to marry me even if he's not ready and then I scared him for wanting children early in our relationship and look what happened? Look what happened?! He was forced to cheat on me and then he died." Callie explained almost making Meredith choke with the shot of tequila she just took.

"That is stupid! You're talking nonsense right now Callie."

"No! And then Erica too. I lead her on with my uncertainties. She hated me so much she just left one of the top hospitals without even thinking twice just because she doesn't wanna see me anymore. I destroyed her too. Penny's right, I'm going to hell, Meredith."

"Okay. I think we had too much tequila for tonight. We should stop." Said the blonde but Callie didn't stop.

"Oh and Arizona... my sweet sweet Arizona. Listen, I ruined Arizona the most. I destroyed my one great love, my wife, I exhausted her mentally, emotionally and physically enough to push her away from me.—"

"You only saved her—"

"I only broke her and this will keep breaking her and she would hate me for the rest of her life when she finds out and that would be my punishment... that would be my hell." She said sending Meredith into confusion.

"And then Penny. I broke Penny... Oh good Lord, I destroy everything I touch. Sofia... Sofia can't have me. I might hurt her, I can't—"

"Callie! Everything Penny has been feeding your brain aren't true. You are not going to believe all those!"

"But they've been said too much I can't help but believe em. They seem real too." Callie whispered. Meredith's heart broke for her friend.

Both ladies just sat in silence. They both found comfort with the sound of the crackling candle sitting atop the center table in front of them.

Callie was massaging her head when Meredith took her injured hand and bent the proximal joint on her middle finger making the brunette beside her flinch in pain.

"Ow!!!! What the hell was that for, Grey?"

"Mmhhmn. Possible tendon injury, with pain it's a good prognosis that it's not completely torn. We need to take an MRI tomorrow and fix whatever's damaged. With therapy your hand may take 4 to 8 weeks to return full function."

"You didn't think I did my own assessment smart ass? I'm THE ortho GODDESS for a reason." She said trying to sound like the old Callie.

"I know. I was just reminding you cause you seem to have forgotten where your brain was when you thought your hand was made out of steel, Ms. Ortho Goddess." Meredith joked, which earned her a laugh from Callie and a little nudge on her shoulder.

"Bitch."

"You said you want Cristina so here she is." They both laughed.

"I miss that woman." Callie said.

"I miss everyone." Meredith agreed til both women fell silent once again.

"Callie, tell me why we're not telling the police about Penny?!" Meredith asked pointing at Callies injured hand.

"We can't."

"We can't because?"

"Because it could ruin _Arizona_ and her career."


	6. Six

6

"Okay, Meredith... Uhm... you've been staring. What do you need?"

Arizona got tired of fidgeting with her pen as she try to ignore the burning watch from the blonde sitting across from her. She hasn't had enough sleep for days because of work, her excitement with having Sofia around for the holidays and because of a certain brunette that never left her mind since that one emotional night.

"I'm not staring!" Meredith defensively answered which received a feisty glare from the fetal surgeon.

"So, when are we starting this meeting?" Arizona asked the group letting Meredith's little lie slip.

The board of directors were all seated in the conference room, the day before Christmas, after they all received a call from Miranda and the Averys for an early stand-up. It was a good thing that all of them were working today so it's not much of an effort for everyone to drop by.

"Not yet, we're waiting for one more—"

"I'm here!" All eyes went to owner of the voice. Callie's hair was put up in a messy ponytail, she had little to no make-up. Just how Arizona likes it.

Arizona tried to calm the storm in her heart. The woman that has been invading her thoughts is breathing in the same room as hers and it's not helping her tame the butterflies. The day she saw Callie in her office door, she felt all her high walls collapse. She tried putting her defenses up but it left her into ruins when Callie closed her door that night.

"Please tell me this meeting is more important than what I have going at Meredith's because I swear, if I stay longer than an hour in this place, we won't have anything but mashed potato on our dinner plate tonight."

Callie filled the room with her presence.

Tonight was the Christmas eve party that Meredith arranged for their group, she volunteered to cook since she's the one who has a lot of time to so she was surprised when she was called to attend the board meeting this morning.

Callie has remained part owner of the hospital but she doesn't really look over the operations anymore. She was only requesting for the hospital's monthly and annual reports to make sure that Mark's share is being put into good use. She's making sure everything goes well for Sofia.

"I just missed having you around during meetings Dr. Torres." Bailey explained.

"Plus..." the tiny woman excitedly strut her way to where the coffee area was and took a plaque of award that was sitting on top.

"Grey-Sloan memorial is this year's number 1 teaching hospital." Miranda couldn't contain her giddy voice, she's like an overexcited child on Christmas morning.

"Merry Christmas everybody!" She added.

"This is awesome!" Arizona exclaimed.

"Which means, Dr. Robbins, you might wanna rethink your decision in moving to Italy, having figured that fetal surgery's spot has been raised from the 1Oth to the 4th place of most popular specialties this year too, those ducklings might wanna come here to experience your magic."

"What?"

"Arizona?"

"You're leaving us?"

Her colleagues have all reacted to Bailey's news, Arizona rolled her eyes in response.

"Gee! Thanks Dr. Bailey. I wonder why I didn't tell anyone yet." Her voice filled with sarcasm.

She felt brown eyes glance at her. She wanted to stare back but she didn't wanna make things awkward for the both of them so she just ignored Callie. When she was sure that her gaze weren't on her anymore that's when she eyed the brunette. Her expression sent confusion to Arizona. Now the latina's fake smile is gone, her fingers were busy fidgeting the edge of the folder that was sitting in front of her, based on the body language, Arizona was sure that Callie is bothered at the moment.

She hasn't told her ex-wife yet of her plans on moving to Italy with Her girlfriend. Arizona and Carina has talked about it for months but she never actually took action until it came up into one of her conversations with April, after she admitted to her friend that she's still in love with her ex-wife and she will always be. That agreeing to be in a relationship with Carina was her hoping to somehow lessen her feelings for Callie. She knew it was unfair, she's been nothing but amazing to both her and Sofia.

After Sofia's outburst in Seattle and after settling their schedule with their daughter and thinking how great Callie is doing now without her. Arizona has thought about it, she wanted to give her relationship with Carina a try, and maybe a new environment would help too, at that moment, Italy sounded nice.

But seeing Callie act like this made her want to rethink her decision. This is Callie's effect on her, if kryptonite deprives Superman of his power, Callie does the same to her. She would never admit that to anyone not even to Callie herself but Arizona has already accepted that fact a long time ago

"And Dr. Torres, you may also wanna reconsider coming back. I mean you've had yet to sign the contract that's in your hand for days now. The number one teaching hospital is in need of your greatness. I mean not that it's gonna help us up since we're already number one but we only want the best from all of America to be teaching and practicing here. So yes?" No one can stop Bailey from talking and smiling. This really must be a happy Christmas news to her.

Arizona has seen how the latina's caramel skin turned into rose gold after Bailey's comment.

"This is not fair. You're putting me under presure" Callie mumbled not being able to look up after realizing that all eyes are on her. Good thing people thought she was kidding so they all laughed and the mood lightened up.

Arizona knows Callie like the back of her hand and this was one thing that changed, if you complement a Torres, you would see her head held high, proud of the amazing things she's done. But now, she couldn't even look at people's eyes. She couldn't even take a simple compliment...

_Wait, she's reconsidering to move back? This is big news... They have A LOT to talk about._ Arizona thought to herself.

Their meeting consisted of the usual, it involved the patient census, incidents and events that happened for the past week as well as the finance and budget report. When the meeting was over. Arizona approached Meredith right outside the door.

"Mer. Did you wanna talk to me about something in private?" She asked the blonde.

"Cause I swear you were staring a while ago and every time you do, it's either some crap happened or someone is dying so tell me which one." Arizona added.

"Hey." Callie came and snuck an arm around Meredith upon hearing her ex wife's interrogation. Arizona noticed the closeness but decided to just brush her thoughts away.

"Hey. My house is not burning yet is it?" Meredith joked trying to ignore Arizona but before Callie could answer, Arizona cleared her throat again.

"I was not staring!" She answered in defeat when she figured that Arizona won't stop until she gets something from her. Callie gaped at Meredith.

The awkward silence between the three got broken when the latina's phone rang. Meredith eyed the caller ID and stared at Callie who turned pale in horror after reading who it was.

_Penny calling..._

"You're not answering that." Meredith almost whispered.

Callie showed fear in her eyes and then realized that Arizona was there too. She tried to fake a smile and gave her gaze back to Meredith.

"I'll go before I actually burn your house down." She joked, her eyes wide as if asking her friend not to drop hints at Arizona.

Arizona hated it. She felt as if she was in a dream where people couldn't see her no matter how much she tries to get noticed. Callie and Meredith acted as if they were in their own world and they were talking in their own language.

"See you there tonight, Arizona." And then she left.

"Have you talked to Callie?" Meredith finally blurted when the latina was nowhere in sight.

"If by talking you mean avoiding me as if I have a disease then maybe we did talk. But have I talked to Callie in our secret language like the one you just shared? No. No I haven't." Arizona blundered.

"Are you jealous of me?" Meredith almost laughed at Arizona's reaction.

"Jealous? No why would I? I mean. I have a girlfriend and you're not into—"

"Callie's hot! Like smoking hot... but... no not really my type." Meredith explaines.

"That's what I thought—wait. Is that why you were staring? Is there something I need to talk to her about? Is—is something going on with Callie?" Meredith was glad when her pager made a noise, saving her from Arizona's death questions.

"I have to go." She almost sang it as she said it.

While walking down the hallway, she heard a muffled voice coming from one of the family rooms that was slightly open, she knew that voice very well. She knows it's wrong to listen but she couldn't stop herself after hearing how the conversation was going.

"Penny, I told you I'll be back next week." She noticed Callie's voice shaking.

"No! No don't! I am not! I was with Meredith the whole time! No. Leave her out of this. Please Penny. I'm begging you. Please." _Leave who out of what? Sofia? I swear that bit—_

"My hand is okay. M-Meredith fixed it." _Meredith? I fixed that._

"Yes I will. I will. I promise."

"Don't do that. Penny. Stop doing this to yourself please. I told you, two weeks so I'm only staying for two weeks. No, honey I—" she watched as Callie held her chest and took a deep breath as if she was running out of it.

"I... I'm not leaving you. I—I promise." She almost said it as a whisper, just audible enough for Arizona to hear.

"Hey Arizona, would you mind checking these scans?"

Arizona jumped in her place upon hearing her name, she saw Callie quickly turn around to check so she ran towards Karev as she mumble all the curses the world could handle and grabbed the envelope that was in Alex's hand.

"Dude, what's wrong with you? If you don't wanna do it then just give me it." Alex asked after noticing how fast Arizona was trying to walk, obviously pissed at him.

"Just...just... I got it okay? I'll page you once I'm done."

"While you're at it, you might wanna check the on call room on 6th." Alex winked at her but she ignored. She didn't even question why. All she's thinking right now is how she got caught listening by Callie. She didn't notice, did she?

"Arizona!" He heard the peds surgeon's call again.

"Page me okay? I'm always here for you." She just weirdly stared at her once protege.

"I'll see you later." And then Alex ran off.

Once she was left walking by herself she couldn't help thinking about what she heard during Callie's conversation with Penny.

She knew something was wrong and it was Penny. Was she hitting Callie? She remembered the way Callie flinched when she thought she was gonna hit her. But Callie? Callie would never let that happen. She's strong and is a fighter if she needs to be. She wants to know the story but she doesn't know how to start asking without her emotions getting to her.

"Dr. Robbins" one of the nurses said in their panicky voice enough to disrupt her train of thoughts.

"Yes?" She asked but was just answered with silence, the way the nurses stared at each other as if they were hiding something didn't go unnoticed by the fetal surgeon. Oh come on!

_Check on call room on 6th._ As if she heard Alex's voice.

She's on the 6th floor... this is Carina's floor.

_Oh god... people are acting weird. She didn't plan a surprise for me did she? Arizona was talking to herself. _She slowly walked her way to the on call room...

But why in the on call room?

Her brain is starting to get hazy all with the thoughts of Callie and now Carina too.

She could hear voices, the closer she get to the door the clearer they get. Her heart started to pound, she could feel the incoming headache. She tried to reach the doorknob, but right before she could even open, the person on the other side already did.

"Arizona" the woman said in her thick accent. All the blood in her face gone, she stared at the blonde as if she saw a ghost. She quickly shut the door behind her.

"I-I thought you're not working today." Carina added.

"I said I didn't have surgery—" she got cut off when suddenly the door behind her girlfriend opened once again.

"Carina— oh uhm —Dr. DeLuca you—I think... uhm... this is yours... excuse me." A woman, who Arizona recognized as one of the floor nurses went out of the on call room after Carina, both their hair a mess. The poor nurse went running after she handed Carina her badge.

"Your pants is still inside out!" Arizona pointed at the young nurse, trying her best not to play monster in front of everyone.

She gave Carina one final look and took off without saying anything... because she doesn't have anything to say. She doesn't know what to say. Her mind is still in shock.

"Arizona—" Carina tried to follow her.

"Don't. Not here." Arizona stopped her.

"I'll see you later."

"I'm not expecting you at the party."

And this is why she hates surprises.

She could feel the throbbing in her thigh after she went walking—almost running away from Carina. Was she not fair for not letting her explain? She doesn't know. All she could see right now is Callie's face. The way Callie suppressed her tears and hitched her breathing as she talked to Penny. Something is going on. She could feel it and she needs to know.

Arizona knew she was late. She was just lying in her bed the whole time. Carina cheated on her. She's been saying it loud enough to make it all real.

She's been cheated on. And then she wiped the tears in her eyes and laughed. This universe is so fucked up.

"The cheater has been cheated on. Ha ha. Funny." She gave her middle finger up in the air as if cursing the gods. She's trying so hard to be a good driver despite her being pissed, last thing she need is a ticket, but as if the universe is trying her, a fast car suddenly cut her lane causing her to step on the brake harder than normal, making all the gifts she's arranged in the back seat topple over.

"Merry _fucking_ Christmas." She let out all her frustrations knowing how she has to change her facade once in front of Sofia.

Her heart was aching. And she doesn't know if it was because of Carina or Callie. All she knows is she's mad. This is another addition to her long list of reasons why she is a laughing stock at the hospital, one of the few people in the hospital who are always part of the new and incoming intern's myth stories. Honestly she's tired of it and it's one of her reason why she agreed to move to Italy with Carina.

The thought made her laugh again. She was really gonna go there. What was she thinking?

"Stupid! You are fucking stupid, Arizona!" She cursed one last time before she turned off her engine.

"Mommy! You're here!" Sofia was the first one to greet her. It took all her will power to wash all her emotions away for Sofia. Now she only has her super magical holiday smile on.

"Merry Christmas, Love." She kissed her daughter on her forehead.

"Merry Christmas, Mommy!"

"Ah uh! We'll open the gifts later, Missy." She stopped her daughter from going over the gifts in her hand. Sofia pouted at her Mom. She's been ogling those gifts since the day she saw them under the Christmas tree.

"Is she giving you her famous pout?" She heard Callie's deep voice from the dining room. She felt her mouth dry when she found the latina in her moss green button up shirt dress. The color of the dress brought out the olive tone in her skin. She saw how Callie has lost all her weight, the dress was fitted on the top which accentuated her breast, Callie also managed to open the dress two buttons down to give a slight tease on her bosoms... hmmnn... she missed those... but they seem smaller now. Is this woman not eating at all? Why is it suddenly warmer?

"Arizona."

"Huh? What?" She immediately snapped out of her thoughts.

"I said Merry Christmas. Drinks are in the kitchen, I saved the white wine for you, I put it in the fridge, I know you want yours chilled. Callie said. Is this Christmas talking? Callie seemed different. Cheerful.

"Thanks Callie. Merry Christmas!" She just managed to say.

"You look great Arizona." Callie added and gave her a look over before heading back to the kitchen.

Arizona was wearing her white off shoulder top paired with her red high waisted wide leg pants. She looked gorgeous in her red lips, her blonde hair was tucked to one side. Her cheeks are now flushed from Callie's comment.

The things this woman could do to her.

"Great, you're now here! Which means we can finally eat dinner. Where's Carina?" Meredith came out of the kitchen this time. The two ladies are setting up the table. The house smelled good with Callie's homecooking.

"Uhm... uh... she's..."

"She has a mother in labor, she needs to stay in." Alex answered for Arizona, Arizona nodded in return. Andrew chose not to add more, he already found out what happened.

They've all worked together for a long time and Meredith knows that secret language. It means 'something happened, don't ask about it.' So she respected Arizona's silence. Arizona mouthed a silent thank you to her friend, Alex.

"Okay, so we're one plate down." Meredith answered.

All eyes went to the front receiving area when suddenly the doorbell rang.

"You expecting anyone else, Mer?" Callie asked with the huge plate of roast beef in hand, followed by Zola and Sofia with the Christmas cookies they decorated.

"Uhm no. Not that I know of."

"I'll get it. Must be some carolers." April volunteered.

After a few minutes of silence while the group started taking their place at the long table set up, April called out.

"Uhm, Mer, we may be needing that extra plate."

Arizona rolled her eyes. Carina. She thought.

_"P-Penny?"_

Arizona was facing Callie, she saw how the latina's face lost all it's color after seeing her unexpected visitor.

"Mama!" Sofia ran to hug her mother. Stopping her to take a step forward.

Arizona turned to check the red-head, she could feel her face flush from anger, so many questions are running through her mind, one that stands out is the reason why her daughter and Callie are reacting like this. What did Penny do?

Like a natural instinct, she stepped in front of Callie and Sofia as if she was shielding them from harm. She's a Robbins and this is what they do.

"How sweet." Penny commented.

"Penny... what... what are you doing here?" Callie collected all her courage to step up and walk towards Penny, leaving Sofia with Arizona.

"Surprise! Merry Christmas!" The red head said in her singsong voice. She was far from the Penny they all met that awful thanksgiving night. This Penny showed confidence and power when she planted a wet kiss on Callie's lips. Callie stayed still.

"Mama!" Sofia ran to grab her mother's arm.

"Aww Baby... don't you miss Auntie Penny?" She spread her arms, waiting to receive a hug from Sofia, but the child chose not to and stared at her Mother's eyes, pleading her not to go near their surprise visitor.

"Mija, how about you get Mommy's gift upstairs. Take Mommy with you." She whispered in Sofia's ear, only loud enough for Sofia to hear.

"But Mama—"

"Go on princess, I'm sure Mommy's excited to see her gift." This time she said it for Arizona, she stared at the blonde pleading her for back up.

"Come on, Sofia. Show me." Arizona said.

"Please?" She asked her daughter.

"Calliope." Arizona whispered which made Callie's walls break down but she stopped it. Was she scared? She definitely is. But it's not the right time to show weakness. She can't ruin this night for everyone.

"We'll just talk. I'll be back. You guys go ahead with dinner. I'm still full from all the cooking and tasting." She tried to joke. She could see Meredith's burning stare from the other side of the room. The blonde shook her head no but Callie didn't listen.

Arizona didn't need to force Sofia to follow what Callie tasked her, the little latina stomped her feet and let out her frustrations as she ran up the stairs, Arizona tried to follow but her leg doesn't let her keep up with her daughter's pace. They just heard a loud banging of the door. Arizona was contemplating wether to follow Sofia or follow Callie who was now heading outside with Penny.

"Go get Sofia. I got Callie." Alex assured her.

"Thank you. I owe you a lot Alex." She whispered.

She wanted to throw herself and hug Karev right now. But she went on her way to Sofia.

"I'll just settle the kids then I will get Sofia." Meredith told Arizona, she knew Arizona needed to follow her ex-wife.

She's grateful for these people. They could really be annoying and nosey at times but they've become family over the years.

"Honey. Can you open the door for Mommy please?" She heard the door click after a few second. She slowly opened the door and sat beside Sofia who had her head down on her knees.

"What's the problem, babe?" She asked her daughter.

"I hate her! I HATE HER!" Sofia said in between her tears.

"That's a strong word, Sof. We don't use that word, remember?"

"She hurt Mama. I can use that word."

"Hey."

"I asked Santa to make Mama happy this Christmas. Now it's Christmas Eve and Penny's here. That's not what I asked for." Arizona wanted to laugh if not for the seriousness of this situation. Sofia sounded like Callie, a lot.

"Why, what does Penny do?" Arizona brought up the untouched topic they had for a week now.

"She cut Mama's hand."

"But that was an accident, remember?" Arizona said as Callie told her.

"She—she makes Mama cry. She throws things at Mama. She shouts at her every night..." Arizona's heart exploded with Sofia's revelation.

"You saw all those? Why didn't you tell me?" She tried her best not to let her tears fall but her heart couldn't handle the thought of Callie being abused. Why was she letting it happen? And now Sofia—

"Mama doesn't know that I know. Mama says it makes you sad whenever we cry. I don't want you to be sad too."

"Oh baby... come here."

"Can you... can you save Mama? Penny might hurt her again..."

"I will, Sof. I will..."

"I'm sure Mommy's excited to see her gift." Penny mimicked Callie's voice.

"What the hell was that Callie? Are you cheating on me? With Arizona? Really? I knew it! Two weeks will turn into a month and then a year and then you will call me to tell me you already got back with Arizona. That's your plan isn't it? Both of you had a plan!" Penny was turning into a beast again. Callie's inside are slowly turning and shaking. She hates this person.

"Penny! Stop it, that is not true." She tried to explain.

"You know what I can do Callie, so you better stop this now before you regret it." Penny threatened her.

"You will not go that low Penny! You will not do that. P-please... not Arizona—" Callie sure heard a flat line and felt the sting on her cheeks despite the numbing winter cold. She definitely didn't miss it but it was a reminder of her normal for the past months.

"HEY!" Alex ran to pull Penny from Callie. He gave enough distance to let the two talk but was taken aback when the red head attacked the brunette. He was shocked to see Callie just stand and accept the impact.

"Callie!" It was Arizona. She had her coat in hand and wrapped it around her ex-wife who was now shaking.

"There goes your dame in shining armor, Ms. damsel in distress." Penny hissed

"You should go now Penny, before I call the police." Arizona was now blocking Callie, using her tiny body to protect her.

"Arizona don't." Callie tried to stop her.

"You wouldn't dare, Arizona." Penny smirked.

"Please Penny just leave. Just let me spend Christmas with my daughter, please." Callie pleaded.

"If you're not at the airport tomorrow at 8 am, you know what could happen Calliope." Penny once again threatened Callie.

"I—I'll be there." Callie answered. Arizona's eyes quickly turned to Callie.

"Callie!?" She asked in disbelief.

"Goodbye Arizona. _Merry Christmas_." Penny threw her smug smile at her. She pushed Alex's hand and went straight to the cab.

"Oh my God..." Callie finally let out when she saw the cab leave. Alex wanted to stay but was asked by Arizona to give them space.

"Shit! Shit! Shit. Aria, pick up the phone. Aria..." Callie was pacing back and forth, phone in her ears. Tears are streaming nonstop.

"Callie." Arizona was trying to stop her.

"Answer your god damn phone, Aria!" She told the air.

"Callie!" Arizona tried and once again ignored.

"Shit. Shit. Shit." Callie let out when the call went straight to voicemail.

"Callie?! What the fuck is happening?" Arizona can't take it anymore. Callie threw her gaze at the blonde and took a deep breath. She saw confusion and anger in those desolate blue orbs.

"Arizona, I can't. I— I need to talk to Aria. I need to fix this. I'm sorry Arizona. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry..." Callie talked really fast. She was nearing the blonde but she jumped when she heard her sister on the other line.

"Aria! Oh God. Oh God. She was here. She's gonna do it. She's gonna do it." Callie started to weep.

"How's everything? Are we? Are we clear... please tell me we are—what?! 80% sure? We can't be 80% sure, I need a hundred!!!! No! Don't call dad, this will do him no good. Please Aria, I need your help. Help me. God, please help me." Arizona couldn't help but empathize.

She doesn't know what's happening but she knew Callie needed her... maybe not her but someone... she wants to be that someone right now.

"Talk to me." She whispered in her ear as she pull the latina closer to her.

"I can't Arizona. I can't..." Callie couldn't even stare at her.

"I'm _scared_..."

The latina confessed for the first time. Arizona wanted to embrace her tight to abolish all the pain there is in Callie's heart and mind.

"_Please Calliope._" This time Arizona was crying, she felt clueless and she feels like Callie couldn't trust her with anything.

Arizona's tears was Callie's wake up call. No matter what she does she will always hurt Arizona and that's the last thing she wants. As much as she wants to protect her, she knows she needs to tell the truth.

"I'm sorry, Arizona." She started.

"I messed up. I messed up big time but let me fix this. I will fix this, I will leave and be with Penny as long as I have to just to fix this and then I promise, I will leave you alone, I will no longer burden you with my presence. I will not cause any more trouble for you and Sofia. I promise, this will be the last of it. _I'm so sorry Arizona_." Callie said in between her sobs.

"Calliope, I don't understand what you're talking about. Make me understand please." Arizona begged.

"Penny has _it_!"

"Penny has what?"

"The video... _our video_."

And with Callie's big news, Arizona's heart stopped beating.


	7. Seven

7

"The video... our _video_."

As doctors before actually stepping into the real world, they are asked to take the hippocratic oath of ethics which makes them promise to put their patient's above the rest, to do no harm and to preserve their moral integrity and virtuous character as sole members of the society.

The video. She knows that video too well. In fact she was the one who insisted to make it, it was during that night at Derek's trailer, it was a romantic Valentine's night as she remembers it, Callie surprised her for Valentine's, she had so much love pouring for Callie that she wanted that moment to last. She had an idea to record their whole shenanigan, Callie objected at first but the idea just seemed so sexy and hot, it gave a different kind of lust, they were in euphoria that night. She used that video and added a lot more private, sexy photos that she took in their bathroom and put those files in a usb flash drive and gave it to Callie as a birthday gift. That along with some lingeries and roses and a little note that says "For your eyes only, my love."

It was one of the naughty things her brain might have already put behind in the farthest stock room that it has. She didn't even think that Callie would still have it with her. Sure, videotaping your sexual activity with your wife is not a big deal, it is meant to be personal and it won't break any code or moral integrity whatsoever if it was kept private but once it is leaked out in public, that's when the problem arises. That's when the medical association board of directors get involved and they decide whether to end your career or to give you another chance after suspension. Usually it's the former that happens to most of her colleagues, ex-colleagues if she may say. Arizona felt her body numb when she realized they may have violated their code. Her and Callie, they could lose both their licenses.

If this scandal breaks out it would affect their hospital, it would force them to pull out shares.

Oh God. It could affect their daughter, Sofia.

"Arizona, I'm doing everything I can. I didn't wanna tell you yet cause I wanna make sure that everything has been cleared. I have the USB back but we're not sure where else she could've saved the files. I already have Aria and our family's security and PR team working to access all her encrypted files. For now she said they're only 80% sure that everything's all cleared out. Until we're on a hundred, I will stay in close proximity with Penny."

"You will what?"

"I will go back to New York with her tomorrow, Arizona. I need to leave Sofia here. With Penny lashing out, it's no longer safe for Sofia to be with us."

"And it's safe for you to be with Penny?"

"I don't know. I just know that she needs help too. I've been urging her to seek help, but she keeps on threatening me to put the scandal out if I put her on psych or..."

"No Callie. You are not leaving Seattle. It's dangerous."

"But I have to!"

"You don't!"

"I will not let her ruin your career Arizona! I will not ruin you anymore."

Arizona's eyes softened. She couldn't believe what she's hearing.

"How long has she have the flash drive?" The blonde asked.

"3 months ago."

"And she never did anything?"

"No."

"In exchange for what?"

"Me staying with her."

"Calliope."

They were quiet for a moment. Callie's tears are falling non-stop. There were no loud sobs, just silent tears, like they're used to falling on her face.

"Okay. Yeah. No. You're not gonna show up in that God damned airport tomorrow. We will fix this. I will help fix this." Arizona commanded.

"How?" Callie's voice was full of hope but she knew she gotta do what she has to do.

"I'll tell my dad."

"No you will not!"

"I will. I don't care if I have to tell him I have a sex video with my wife on the loose. He's my dad, he will protect me, us. He has connections, he could help us. Clearly we're both victims here. That was supposed to be a private matter. And her threatening you and scaring you just for you to stay with her is abuse, Callie!"

Although there was only a little light illuminating them, Arizona could see Penny's hand mark on Callie's cheeks even with a layer of make up on it. The latina's right eye is also starting to swell. That was a pretty strong hit. She heard it, and it didn't help that Callie didn't even flinch and just accepted the impact.

However, Callie tried to avoid Arizona's touch when she brought her fingers to her face. She could still feel the sting, which means there's a possible mark, and it would need layers and layers of make-up to hide it.

"H-has she been hurting you?" Arizona asked almost as a whisper, although she was already expecting the answer to her question, a part of her is still hoping that this is the first time Penny lay a hand on Callie, that the cut on the surgeon's hand was really just an accident but there's no sense for Callie to lie and hide anymore, so when Callie nodded her head. That's when Arizona's tears made their appearance.

"Why did you— why are you allowing it?" She can't even finish her sentence. She's hurting for Callie. No matter what happened between them she knows Callie deserve none of these. When Callie didn't answer, she answered for her.

"It's because of me, isn't it?"

"Let's—Let's just go back inside, I'm sure they're waiting for us." Callie didn't confirm nor deny Arizona's claim.

Back inside the house, the atmosphere was heavy. Bailey gasped when she saw the obvious discoloration on Callie's face but decided not to say anything. Thankfully the Latina was wearing make-up. It must look pretty bad underneath.

"I need ice." Arizona said as soon as they entered the door. April was quick to get her some ice pack.

"I-I can do it." Callie tried to grab the ice pack from Arizona.

"Let me." She didn't give a fight when Arizona pulled her hand back.

"I think we should go. Callie you're coming with us." Arizona said after tending to Callie

"What?" The brunette asked.

"No. No one's leaving. Something happened but it doesn't mean we're not gonna celebrate tonight. The kids have been ecstatic about this, let's give it to them." Meredith tried to stop her guests from leaving.

"I'm with Meredith, Arizona. Sofia's really excited to spend Christmas Eve with Zola and Tuck." They all heard Arizona sigh.

"Okay. Agreed. But starting tonight you are staying with me and Sofia, Calliope. No buts, no questions."

"Mama?!" Before Callie could even argue, Sofia already made her way to where her mother is. She stopped when she saw Arizona placing some ice bag on her Mama's face.

She was about to ask but she was cut shortly.

"What happened to your face Auntie Cal?" Zola who was standing behind Sofia, asked innocently.

"She fought with the Christmas monster, now we can have dinner in peace."Meredith explained to her daughter.

"But Mommy, you said there are no monsters." Zola told her Mom.

"There's one but Mama already sent her away. You did, right Mama?" Sofia answered for Meredith when she realized who her Auntie Meredith was pertaining to.

Everyone in the room exchanged glances after hearing Sofia's comment.

"Actually, _Mommy did_." Callie told her daughter.

"I knew it. Thank you, Mommy." Sofia hugged Arizona and whispered something in her Mommy's ear, making Arizona smile.

...

It was past midnight when Sofia, Callie and Arizona arrived at the latter's home. After dinner, they've exchanged gifts, let the kids open some and went home. She was surprised how well they saved the party for the kids despite the Penny mishap. All the mothers did their best to cheer the party up, Christmas is for the children anyway. The singles enjoyed it as well with all the alcohol they have. They've decided to celebrate together on Christmas eve because most of them are working on the day itself.

Arizona made her way to her kitchen to grab a tall glass of iced water. Grateful that Callie offered to take Sofia to her room, now she has time alone to actually digest what happened—what is happening.

There's actually a possibility for her license to be revoked. Her body shivered just by the idea of her not being a surgeon anymore. She could feel her tears plummet down her face once again. She won't let it happen. She would put up a fight... which made her think of Callie, of what brought her ex-wife to a choice to just let Penny abuse and manipulate her. It is so _un-Calliope_ if she could even call it that.

Her train of thoughts were interrupted when a knock on the door followed by a doorbell rang through her household. When she checked who it was, she let out a deep sigh. This day just keeps getting longer and longer, she just wants it to end. This is not the Christmas she signed up for.

"Carina" she acknowledged the person at the door. The guest stepped in when Arizona opened the door widely for her.

"Arizona... I got these for Sofia and you." Carina explained when when she saw the blonde noticed all the holiday bags in her hands.

"Please talk to me, Amore." She pleaded when Arizona remained silent.

"Can we not do it today? I need time Carina. I-I can't."

"I didn't mean to—"

"I know. And I wish I could say I can understand— I should understand you but I can't. Not right now, it's just too much—"

"I'll give you space, baby. I'll wait. I just wanna say I'm really sorry and I love you."

"Carina—" she was cut shortly when the tall brunette's eyes got fixed on a pair of suitcases sitting right beside the staircase.

"Are those— Are those Sofia's?" She knew they weren't Sofia's and when Arizona couldn't look straight into her eyes, she already knew the answer to her question.

"Sh-she came back for you didn't she?" Saying it out loud is painful, she was only playing this scenario in her head when she saw her girlfriend's ex-wife in her girlfriend's office. She was jealous but she couldn't act jealous cause she didn't wanna start a fight with Arizona.

"No. No not for me. She just—something happened and we need to face this as a family, Carina." _As a family__._ She never knew what heartbreak was until tonight.

"God, I hate it. I hate how I gave you the chance to push me out if the corner even more than you would." Now her voice is all panicky, this is it. She's losing the love of her life.

"Carina."

"No. I get it. Arizona, sharing you with Sofia is one thing that I would never mind doing. I love your daughter. B-but to share you with Callie too? No... I've been sharing you with her the whole time, haven't I?" Arizona couldn't help but nod. Carina felt like Arizona threw a dagger to her chest and pulled it right back.

They shared silence filled with hefty breathing and restrained sobs. After a heavy minute, Carina let out a long sigh as if she was accepting defeat.

"Okay... so I guess, Italy..." she broke the silence.

"I'm sorry Carina." Was all Arizona could say.

"I will cancel our tickets." Carina almost whispered, trying her best not to let her emotion suck her up.

"No... no... you should still go. There's a nice opportunity waiting for you out there."

"I will. I just have to cancel our tickets so I could book the earliest flight."

Arizona nodded, this time letting her tears fall. It was painful to let Carina go but she knows this is what they both need to do. They shared a wonderful relationship together, something uncomplicated and light, it was just easy going filled with hot sensual sex. But Arizona knew love wasn't just there yet, at least on her part.

"So I guess this is goodbye, Arizona."

"I guess it is."

Arizona opened the door for Carina, she stopped the brunette before she fully stepped out of her house.

"Carina... I just wanna say thank you for loving Sofia. My daughter likes you... a lot! She really likes you and tomorrow she's probably gonna ask about you. I'll give her your gift. Thank you Carina. Thank you for loving us.—"

Carina ran back to kiss Arizona for the last time. The latter gave in, fully giving her her lips. The final kiss they shared was rough and hungry. They could both taste their salty tears. Carina was the one to pull back, laying her lips atop Arizona's forehead.

"I love you, Arizona. Crap, this will take a lot of time to heal. I will miss you both and I am sorry. "

"I forgive you, Carina."

"Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas."

"_Ciao, amore mio._" (Goodbye, my love.) Carina whispered and left.

When Arizona closed the door she felt her chest constricting, she's having a hard time breathing, she held it tightly. It felt like a heart attack except she wasn't having one. Everything that's happening has dawned on her, she just broke up with Carina, sure it was painful, but what's really bothering her is Callie. Of what she's gone through without having anyone backing her up. She could feel the throbbing on her thigh. She decided to sit on the sofa so she could gather herself before going to her bedroom.

"We don't have to do this Arizona. This is what I meant. I don't wanna cause any more trouble. Me staying here is a mistake." Callie's voice frightened her.

"H-how long have you been there?" Arizona saw Callie stepping out of the stairway, now walking towards her.

"Long enough"

Arizona just stared at Callie, thinking carefully what to tell her.

"I'm sorry." Callie offered.

"What are you sorry about this time?" Arizona didn't mean to snap at her.

"This. I feel like... I'm bringing all the bad stuff with me and it affects all the people I love. I always mean well but it always turn out the other way. Now it's affected your relationship—"

"Me and Carina? It's not in any way your fault, Callie."

"No? B-but I just heard... I can go talk to her, if it helps. I'll explain everything. You don't have to end your relationship. You should—you should go to Italy. You can take Sofia with you, I'll just visit once a while. Maybe it's better that way. The distance—"

"Carina _cheated_ on me." Shock. Shock was painted on Callie's face.

"Wha—Oh. I'm sorry." Was all she could offer Arizona.

"Don't be. I deserved that."

"No, you don't. Was it just one time? Give her a chance, Arizona." Now the blonde was puzzled.

"She thought I came back for you. She must have gone through so much thinking I'm taking you away from her, it's wrong but she had to release her stress and tension somehow." So Callie really heard everything.

"If there's one thing I've learned, Callie, it's that people are gonna cheat if they really wanted to cheat no matter how great or bad the situation is. She wanted it... just as much as I wanted it before." When Callie remained quiet, Arizona continued. "It took years for me, I was defensive and I blamed it all with my leg and the plane crash but I am now acknowledging my fault, Cal. I did it, I cheated on you because I wanted to. Because at that moment I was really attracted to another person. I took the bait and ruined our marriage." Arizona admitted.

"I've already forgiven you, Arizona."

"I know that. But I haven't truly forgiven myself yet. And you're not hearing my point. I ruined our marriage just as much as you did. The two of us are to blame just like how both of us are at fault here. That stupid video wouldn't be here if I didn't force you that night."

"You didn't force me and it's not stupid." Callie mumbled.

"Maybe I didn't force you, which makes it your mistake too. Although I don't agree with your choices, you sticking up with Penny, accepting everything just to— just to save MY career, you've already done your fair share of solving this problem so let me do mine. It's both our career on the line, not just mine."

"I don't even care about my career anymore. I just want everything to be over, I just want to breathe again._ I'm so tired_, Arizona." Arizona was truly hurting for Callie. She could see that the latina was tired, her eyes are dull with no life, the sparkle in her eyes, the one she fell in love with, are gone.

"Let me fight this battle with you Callie." She held Callie's hand.

"But— how are we? What would be our plan?" Because she has a plan and so far it is working.

"For now I don't know yet. My brain and my body just can't function today. It's Christmas, we shouldn't be this stressed. We should rest for now Cal. Let's enjoy tomorrow with Sof and then we'll figure things out." Arizona explained to her.

"Okay." Callie quickly answered. Arizona knew that Callie wasn't okay with the idea.

Callie is now sitting, a seat apart, beside Arizona.

"You're seriously just gonna let me take Sofia to Italy?" Arizona broke the silence when she felt that they both recovered.

"Because I don't have any fight with me anymore, Arizona. Besides I know she will do well with you, sure there will be tantrums but she'll be safer without me around her. I've caused that kid so much, I now get why the court didn't trust me with my own daughter." She almost chuckled making Arizona's heart ache.

"I don't know what Penny has been feeding your mind Calliope and I wish I could wipe out all the nasty things she made you believe you were but there's one thing I am sure of... you are exactly what Sofia needs and our little girl loves you and cares for you so much." They didn't wanna cry anymore but their tears are failing them.

"After everything that's happened tonight, there's one thing that made me really happy, it's knowing that we're precisely on track in raising our child, being the best parents we could be for her. She's smart and brave, Callie. Truly honorable, like her parents." Arizona added.

"She's too smart for her age." Callie chuckled.

"Too smart. At such a young age, monsters and nightmares are far too imaginary for her. You know, when she says monster she meant Penny." This made Callie laugh desite her tears.

"And when she says nightmare she meant hearing Penny tell you all the bad stuff and hearing you cry yourself through the night." Callie's eyes grew wider hearing it from Arizona. She didn't know Sofia heard Penny every time she lash out. She thought they were careful to keep everything in their bedroom.

"Yes, Calliope. She knows what's happening, there's no sense in sugar coating this to her anymore." Callie nodded in agreement.

"You know she wants to save her Momma from the monster? Which makes me so proud, it brings out the Robbins in her— but for now, she can't do it by herself, so I might have made a little pact with our daughter." Arizona said, smiling a little as she wipe her tears.

"A-a pact?" Callie asked.

"Yes. That I would be the one to do the saving." Arizona clenched Callie's hand that she's been holding on to.

"Arizona." Callie tried to protest.

"I don't want you to think that I'm forcing you to stay with me—_us_. It's still your choice Calliope. You can stick with your plan but I want you to know that I might have a plan too, I just don't know what it is for now but I know I'll make up one that doesn't involve you being a sacrificial lamb to Penny. I just—I just hope you give me a chance to fulfill my promise to Sofia. Not that you need my saving, though. I know you can pull this off yourself, I just— I can't imagine you getting hurt for me any longer so please _stay_."

...

**A/N: There you go. No cliffhanger this time. Sorry it's taking a long time for me to update. Right now I'm preoccupied with my upcoming board exam as a physiotherapist. I know, I'll break bones for a living too just like Calliope and I'm really excited. Anyway, the other day I was watching Life As We Know It on Netflix and I couldn't help but imagine what if the characters were Calzona. Now I don't know if somebody already made a fic inspired by it but I know I am. Hope you check it out too! I'll be posting first chapter today. **


	8. Eight

8

Arizona didn't even need her alarm and the sun to wake her. Her body jolted as soon as she felt that she needed to wake up.

_7:46 am. _

She panicked when she saw that it was already too late, Callie might have already left. Having a sore thigh from yesterday's happenings, she opted to just use her crutches and find Callie to try and stop her. Grabbing her car keys, she gracefully maneuvered her way down the stairs.

She was too occupied with panic that she didn't even bother the smell of bacon and french toast cooking. Her heart only swelled when she found a pair of suitcases near her couch. _She's still home_. She turned around and see a pair of brown eyes already staring at her.

"Good morning." A made up Callie greeted. The smile on Arizona's face faltered when she realized that Callie was dressed up to leave.

"Y-you're leaving?" Arizona was scared to ask knowing what possible answer Callie could give.

"I _left_." Callie almost whispered leaving Arizona confused.

"I left but then I realized I didn't really want Sofia crying on Christmas day so I told my driver to just take me back. So here I am now, making you and my daughter breakfast so we could start this day right. Merry Christmas." Arizona stared at Callie. She wanted to run to her and hug her if not only for the crutches.

"Merry Christmas. I thought... I really thought..." Arizona couldn't talk through her tears. She doesn't even know why she was crying. She was really overwhelmed.

"It came to me how I've been given the opportunity to run away from the dark Arizona, and my heart keeps telling me to trust you so here I am trusting you."

"Thank you." Was all Arizona could utter.

"I made coffee, but I know you and Sofia want hot chocolate on Christmas morning so I made you one too. I hope you don't mind, I— used your kitchen." Callie placed the mug on the counter. Arizona didn't answer she was just staring at her so it worried her.

"Are you-are you fine? You're using your crutches." Callie commented not knowing how to touch a sensitive topic.

"I'm fine. It's just a little sore." Arizona explained as she head her way towards the seat to have her hot chocolate. It tasted like Christmas, even better cause Callie made it for her. "I was trying to catch you so I didn't bother with the leg. I'm really glad you're here."

"You really expected I would leave?" Callie asked as she glanced upon the car keys in Arizona's hand.

"Yes. Cause that's you. You always do things the way you plan them and I'm not really the most ideal person to stop you from doing so. I could only say things but it's still up to you, I would not hold you hostage here, you know." Arizona explained. Callie knew this was not true. Arizona did just fine to stop her. Callie couldn't handle to hide her smirk.

"You'd go to the airport wearing your santa PJs just to stop me?" Arizona thinks she saw a smile on Callie's face for the first time since she arrived.

"If that's what it takes." She said as she shrugged her shoulder. "A girl could try." Arizona played along nonchalantly. "And I'm matching with Sofia." She added as if it was a defense.

"This is nice, Calliope." Callie's heart swelled with the mention of her name, the way only Arizona could.

"What is?" Callie asked. Now Arizona felt stupid for saying it. They're in the middle of chaos and yet this morning with Callie calmed her.

"This. Us talking, just talking. Without raising our voices. Or crying. I'm tired of crying. It's only been a day for me. Not even a day. Oh god." Callie only gave a light smile. Arizona felt too insensitive.

"I'm sorry. I know you've been through worse. I just—"

"I get it Arizona. It really is tiring. That's why I just want it to be over. I'm sorry for dragging you into this."

"I will start collecting a dollar from you every time you say you're sorry."

"I-I'm sorry." Callie said again.

"You owe me a dollar." Arizona shook her head. Callie laughed at her.

"How's your face?" Arizona asked when she noticed a hint of discoloration near the latina's lips. It was dark enough to still be visible under her make up.

"Better. It just needs layers and layers of make up. How's your thigh?" Callie asked, trying to steer the subject away from her bruised face. She hates it. It's a sign of her weakness and she hates seeing it. She hates seeing them, all of them.

"It's sore but it's better than nothing." Callie raised her eyebrows at the blonde. She's making jokes about her leg. That's a step up.

"Mommy!" Sofia's grumpy and whiney voice was heard, breaking the little bubble they were in.

"Your daughter's up." Callie chuckled as she made her way to the pan to cook her daughter's pancakes.

"Oh so she's my daughter when she's cranky?" Arizona answered, her eyebrows raised, there was a hint of smugness on her lips, Callie just shrugged.

"Mommmmyyy!!!" Sofia whined, now louder, making both ladies laugh.

"Hey! We don't whine on Christmas Day! What do you need baby?" Arizona answered, she was now facing the stairs.

"I can't find Mama." Sofia was now rubbing her eyes and crying, they could hear her footsteps from the stairs.

"I'm in the kitchen sweetheart." It was now Callie who answered. "No running Sof—"

Two small arms ran to hug Callie's legs. She was indeed wearing the same pajama as Arizona's, she felt slightly jealous because her two girls are looking so festive and cute with their matching red and green pjs that has santa's face on them with a bunch of ho ho ho's written all over, it was too perky, it shouts Arizona all over and it was cute. She wanted one too.

"Mama you're really here. I thought I was dreaming last night when you came home with us. Did you have a sleepover? How was it? Are you friends with Mommy now? Are we staying here forever?" The little girl excitedly asked making Callie laugh.

"Slow down. How about we eat breakfast first then I'll answer those questions, is that alright little Arizona?" Callie playfully answered her daughter. Sofia may look like her but her little girl is Arizona in so many ways.

"Really?" She heard Arizona's side comment. She just stared at the blonde and smiled at her.

The trio shared an intimate Christmas breakfast, Sofia did all the talking as usual. Arizona felt like she shouldn't be this happy amid the issue and the possible scandal, and especially not after her breakup with Carina but she couldn't contain her happiness. Seeing the sparkle in her daughter's eyes and Callie laughing along as if nothing bad happened last night is enough for her.

She remembered their wedding day, as she was staring at the love of her life walking down the aisle, this is what Arizona was picturing in her mind, her, Callie and Sofia and Mark too, celebrating Christmas together as a family. Her smile faltered when she realized, they were missing one.

"Are you alright, Arizona?"

"Mark would be delighted to see the three of us together." She said. Callie smiled.

"I miss him too." Callie said.

"Daddy?" Sofia asked, hearing Mark's name.

"Yes, Daddy." Arizona answered.

"Can we watch my baby video again? And your wedding video too!" Sofia excitedly asked.

"You've seen our wedding video?" Callie asked.

"Yeah. Me and Mommy always watch it." Sofia said causing Callie to look at Arizona.

"Yeah, c-cause Mark's there too." Arizona answered making Callie smile.

"Okay we'll watch the videos after I'm done cleaning Mommy's kitchen." Callie told her daughter making Sofia pout.

"You can open all your gifts while waiting. I received your gifts from Mawmaw and Pawpaw, they told me you're gonna love it." Arizona told Sofia who eventually ran towards all her gifts, including the two huge ones from Arizona's parents.

"Still the good cop, I see." Callie commented.

"Always the good cop, Calliope. That's my role." Arizona winked at Callie. "I'll just get my leg so I can help you."

When Arizona left, Callie made her way back to the kitchen to start cleaning up while Sofia busied herself with all her gifts. All of Sofia's squeals and excitement made Callie laugh. She cant believe that she almost missed this moment. She erased the negative thoughts in her before she noticed the blonde's phone ringing. She wanted to check who it was as if it's a normal thing to do but stopped when she realized she doesn't have the right to do so anymore. She's not the wife or the girlfriend and it is Arizona's privacy.

"Arizona, your phone's ringing!" She shouted when she heard shuffling noise from upstairs meaning Arizona's on her way down.

"I'll be right there. Can you check who it is?" The blonde shouted back making Callie slightly uncomfortable.

"It's..." Callie scrunched her nose. She checked the phone again making sure it wasn't hers. "It's Aria?" She was now staring at Arizona, who just arrived downstairs, questioningly. Why was her sister calling Arizona. They never met each other. Why does Arizona have contact with her?

"Oh. Answer it." Arizona said as she ran beside the brunette.

"Hey" Arizona greeted.

"Hey Arizona, it's Aria."

"Hi. Yeah. Uhm. You're on speaker. Calliope's here with me."

"She is?! _Dios Mio! Muchas gracias._ Thank you! Thank you so much Arizona." Callie made eye contact with Arizona as if asking for answers or explanation.

"I didn't do anything Aria. It was her decision."

"But still, I don't know what you told her to make her change her mind. I was so scared she would go back to that-that woman. I knew it. She just needed to see you so she could clear her mind. She was, I don't know, hypnotized by that tramp?! I swear, I thought I would lose my sister, no actually I lost her, she's not the same anymore, that-that Penny broke her!—"

"Aria. Arizona told you you were on speaker so you know I could hear you right?" Callie cut her sister off.

"You could? Then great. I actually wanted you to hear it." Her sister said. It made Arizona chuckle.

"So... anyway. Are there any phone calls?" Aria was now serious.

"Phone calls?" Callie asked.

"From Penny?!"

"Shit! Shit! Shit!" She ran to check her bag. "I didn't even bother checking my phone. Why am I so stupid?!" She whispered to herself.

"Okay check it now but don't answer! Let her leave voicemails and text messages. She will leave threats for sure and we'll use those as evidence."

"Aria—"

"We will sue her after we're all cleared Callie. This is not up for discussion." Aria cut her off. Arizona was thankful for Aria. She was now staring, her heart was aching, she could sense Callie's love for Penny, she didn't even want to take it to court despite all the abuse she's received. Arizona cleared her mind. Now is not the time to open some healing wounds from their past.

True enough when Callie checked her phones there were missed calls, voicemails and messages all leaving threats about the video being sent out. Callie shivered with the idea of failing to save her ex-wife but she chose to trust Aria, their security team and now Arizona too.

"I'll check my emails maybe they sent something." Arizona suggested to check if the boards has summoned her for a meeting.

"You can do that but I doubt they already have it. Or if they do, I doubt they will take any actions today. It's Christmas."

"So what do we do?" Callie asked.

"We wait. We wait and hope that we deleted everything, that she doesn't have any spare copy to send the boards of medicine." Aria answered. When she heard silence over the line she just added.

"Now what you will do Callie is to enjoy this day. Por el amor de dios, Callita! (For Christ's sake, Callita!) Give my niece the Christmas she deserve. That little girl went through so much, the last thing she needs is a boring Christmas. You and Arizona owe her that. Take her out, be a family at least for today. Give her the Torres Christmas we grew up having. It's a tradition we don't miss!"

"And I still wonder why you're mom's favorite?! You sound so much like her." Callie joked despite the fear she has on her throat. Arizona just smiled at the interaction but then looked at Callie when she noticed a hint of sadness and regret back in her eyes.

"Loca! (Crazy!) you both promise me you'll take my favorite little girl out, she will eat all the sweets and candies and you will force her to take a photo with Santa." Arizona chuckled.

"We will." She answered her sister in law—ex-sister-in-law.

"Good, I have to go now. Dad's calling, I'm having lunch with him." Aria said. Arizona still watched Callie throughout their phone call. The sadness, regret and now fear too was visible in Callie's eyes and Arizona couldn't help but wonder why,

"Cal, I have another favor." Aria said, her tone suddenly too serious.

"Please call Dad. He needs you—" her sister added.

"I-I can't." Callie answered quickly. Arizona was just watching Callie's response.

"Please Cal. He's too worried. I didn't say anything but he knows something's up. Daddy needs you and you need him too. At least call him.—"

"I'll try, Aria." Callie gave up.

"Great. He's not mad. Not at all. We just miss you." Aria said before Callie ended the call.

They were quiet for a while. Arizona offered to dress Sofia up for the day. She was still bothered by Callie's sudden quietness after Aria mentioned their dad. She didn't wanna ask so she just left Callie alone.

It took both Arizona and Sofia almost an hour to dress up. The little girl was chatting her way throughout the time Arizona was fixing her hair. She was so happy to have both her moms for Christmas day, it made Arizona really happy for her daughter too. In fact she feels the same way. She's happy to have Callie back, well not really back, she's happy to have Callie's presence today.

After watching a few family videos as promised, Callie and Arizona took Sofia out for the day. They went to the park, the nearby mall, they brought Sofia to all the Christmas events available for their daughter to enjoy, they couldn't deny the chemistry the three of them have, it was like they were never apart as family. Arizona and especially Callie has pushed whatever emotions and problems they have aside so they could let Sofia enjoy this day. They both noticed that they still have the natural groove to co-parent their little girl.

"This is the best Christmas ever!" Sofia squealed in the car on their way home.

"Yeah? You said that last year when Tía Aria got you your doll house." Callie teased her daughter.

"I know, Mama, but this is the best-est Christmas ever cause we're with Mommy." Arizona's heart swelled with joy. She made sure to focus on the road.

"This is my best Christmas too princess." She managed to answer.

"Mama, are you staying at Mommy's house or you're going back to Auntie Mer's?" The sleepy girl at the back seat asked as she yawned.

"I..." before Callie answered, her eyes gazed at Arizona. As if on cue Arizona stared back at her. "I'm staying at Mommy's." She continued making Arizona smile.

"Yaaaaaaay! Can I not sleep yet? I really don't wanna sleep! I'm so happy!" Sofia said in her sing song voice. Arizona tilted her head when she heard Sofia's voice.

"I think we should enroll her in music, voice lessons?! She got your beautiful voice Calliope. I always hear her singing." Arizona said.

"We should, yeah. If that's what she likes." Callie agreed, trying to hide her blush. She was mentally slapping herself for still feeling like a hormonal teenager around Arizona.

"But I like gymnastics." Sofia pouted when she overheard her parent's conversation.

"Oh... god no. No gymnastics." Arizona answered but it was directed at Callie.

"Remember what I told you about gymnastics and broken bones?" Callie told Sofia making Arizona sigh in relief, at least they were on the same page about this topic. They both realized they never really talk about Sofia's extra curricular activities.

"She's been begging to be enrolled in gymnastics." Callie told Arizona.

"Trust me, I know." Arizona shook her head.

Having a combination of pediatric and an orthopedic surgeon as parents means this is near impossible to come true. Both are too cautious and scared for the possible injuries the sport could give their daughter.

"But Mama, I have a classmate, she does gymnastics she doesn't have broken bones." Their daughter whined.

"Not yet but she will. So no gymnastics, we already talked about this Sof. Remember? You can do dance... ballet if you want to." Arizona explained to her daughter.

"Mommy, I'll do gymnastics and I promise I won't have broken bones cause I'm awesome!" a sleepy Sofia tried to explain to Arizona.

"Yup, she's yours." Callie just chuckled at her ex-wife.

It was a long day for the three of them. Sofia wanted Arizona to tuck her in mainly so she could convince her to be enrolled in gymnastics, she already surrendered with Callie, her Mama has sternly said no while they were in New York. Callie has explained to her seven year old why they were overprotective of her, telling her about their near death experience and Callie not wanting to experience that with her daughter all over again. She figured it was the same speech Arizona was giving Sofia. They both knew that her bringing this topic up only means she still doesn't wanna sleep.

"But it's just gymnastics, Mommy!" She heard Sofia debate with her Mom. She just mouthed good luck to Arizona as she quietly slip inside the guest room where she was staying. She already had the same bargaining conversation with Sofia months ago so it's now Arizona's turn.

...

Making sure Sofia was already sleeping, she quietly slipped out of her daughter's bed. She strolled out wanting a nice hot bath to cap off her day, she was exhausted to say the least. Before she could go to her room she had to pass by the guest room where Callie was staying. She didn't really mean to see what her guest was doing but the door was slightly open and when she peeked through she felt her heart break again.

Callie was sitting at the edge of the bed still in her robe, she was freshly showered guessing with the towel wrapped around her head, her face is covered in her hands as her shoulders are shaking. The latina was trying to control her sobs, staying as quiet as she could so nobody hears her crying.

Arizona contemplated for a minute whether she would come in and talk to Callie. She wanted to leave her alone but the tugging in her heart stopped her. Callie clearly needs someone.

"C-Callie?!" Arizona couldn't stop herself now from opening the door. She quietly closed it too so Sofia wouldn't hear her mother crying. Callie quickly dried her face. "Is it okay?" Arizona asked and sat beside her when she nodded her head.

"Yeah. I'm sorry. Was I too loud? I-I didn't mean to—Is Sofia asleep?" With her voice shaking, Callie wiped her tears. Without the brunette's make up, Arizona now has a clear view of the effect Penny's wrath left on Callie's face.

"I-I used some of the shampoo and soap in your bathroom. I'll just buy some of my stuff tomorrow—" Callie stuttered when she felt Arizona staring at her.

"You can use all those Callie." The blonde just cut her off. After a few silence, Arizona was the one to break it.

"Does your face hurt?"

She knows it was a stupid question. The tears Callie was crying was definitely more than just because of her bruises. She confirmed it when she saw the expensive teardrop diamond necklace in Callie's hand. She remembers that piece of sparkling jewelry, it was one that Callie only wears on special occasions, a gift from her mom from her grand quinceañera. She knows how special it is to her ex-wife.

She knew this tears aren't for Penny. It's much deeper than that, it was about the phone call from Aria. It was about her parents. Arizona now felt bad for intruding her guest's privacy. Obviously she's having a problem in their family and now that Arizona's an ex-wife, it's already something out of her scope.

But she could be Callie's friend, right?

"If—if you miss them that much why don't you give them a call?" Arizona finally had the courage to say, she instantly regret saying her words when Callie shook her head and started sobbing again.

"I—I want to but I can't." Callie's voice cracked. She breathed in and stayed silent again for a while. That was a sign that Callie was not ready to open up yet and Arizona wanted to respect that.

"I wan't to call _her_ but—"

"You don't... you don't really have to tell me. Callie. I'm sorry for pushing you—"

"No. No Arizona. If I'm gonna trust you, I wanna trust you with everything. I wanna lay all my cards. I want you to know everything. I no longer want to hide and keep it all in. That's—that's only if you want to know all of them." Callie explained.

When empty brown eyes made contact with her own pair of blues she knew this was a sensitive topic that Callie is willing to share.

"I want to know everything." Arizona almost whispered, she did as she grabbed Callie's hand and carefully wrapped it with hers. She doesn't care about whatever signal or message it sends to Callie.

She knew they're both vulnerable right now. She's openly honest to her own emotions, she knows that she's still in love with her ex-wife. That Callie will always be the greatest love of her life and she knew that it will never change anytime soon. So here she is putting her guards down. No more hate, anger or bitterness thrown at Callie. She just wants to be present, to listen and to help Callie get through with her struggles.

"I... uhm... We were supposed to be here 3 months ago." Callie started. Arizona just stared at her, Callie knew that it meant she needed more than what she just said.

"3 months ago, Penny and I had the biggest fight. I brought Sofia over for a playdate with my resident's daughter so she wouldn't hear anything. I was already on the verge of fighting back so I spared her, I spared Sofia—"

"Calliope." Was all Arizona said when she noticed her rattling. She knew Callie has the tendency to do it when she's nervous. And she was nervous too.

"I'm sorry." Callie breathed in to compose herself. She wanted to explain to Arizona where Penny's hatred came from. After a pregnant sigh, she started talking again.

"Penny despised me for telling on her when she breached hospital protocol so she could save a patient's life. I only wanted to spare her from losing her license so I asked our chief to help and then it dawned on me that our chief was not Richard or Bailey, that they are not family, that they only see their hospital as a business venture and the doctors are the products they sell. That moment, I knew that leaving Grey Sloan was a huge mistake." Callie breathed in. Arizona figured that this is gonna be a longer night.

"Despite saving the patient's life they still fired Penny, and they cut off her research fund and now every hospital she applies for turns her down because of that issue and unfortunately, Derek's death is still haunting her career as well. She—she hasn't been inside an OR , not even a doctor for that matter in months and she blames me for it. I blame myself for it too. I trusted people too much. It's my fault. Penny has been nothing but amazing and I broke her just like how I broke you." Callie explained.

"You—you didn't break me. You have to stop saying that Calliope." Arizona said under her breath. Hearing those words from Callie made Arizona's heart melt.

"But I did Arizona. I broke you and then I broke her. Now she's not the Penny I fell in love with. She's just an empty shell—"

"Like how I was after my amputation?" Arizona asked, that line sounded familiar. Callie said that once about her.

"No. Not even close to it, she was way worse. I couldn't talk to her. She couldn't look at me. She stopped talking to me, she stopped talking to Sofia. I can feel how she doesn't want us to be there but every time I leave and I try to break up with her she always end up in a hospital. She always tries to kill herself and then she will tell me to come back because she loves me and she couldn't live without me so I always go back and then she would lure me to have sex—" Callie stopped so she could look at Arizona, just to make sure if her ex-wife is comfortable with this talk. When Arizona nodded her head, urging her to continue, she followed.

"not—not the amazing kind but the rough one where I could only feel pain the next day. Pain and marks. All over my body. I usually feel so disgusted after." She steadied her breath before she continued, she was trying to ignore Arizona's body that's now starting to shake. The hand that was holding her are turning colder.

"It became our routine, Arizona, and she became hateful too. She starts telling me things that I eventually believed. They're all true anyway. I'm stupid, you know? And a slut too. I slept around a lot, before when I was single, even when I was married with George and right after I divorced you I slept around, I even got Sofia right after our break-up cause I sleep around so much. Who was I to judge you, right?

"

"No, Callie. That doesn't make you—" Arizona could feel her anger rising.

"Maybe she's right Arizona. She says I destroy people and I should stay away from you and Sofia, she keeps on saying that eventually Sofia would see the real me and would hate me once she grows up. And I—I don't want that to happen. I don't." Callie was almost whispering through her tears.

"That will never happen Callie. You are an amazing person, an amazing mother and Sofia would see you as you are. I will make sure that she will." Arizona said, she swore she was seeing red.

"But isn't she right though? I took away one thing that makes Sofia happy and that's you, our family. Penny's right. I broke our family apart, I broke you and eventually, Sofia too."

"No. No. That's not true.—" Arizona wanted so much to clear things up with Callie but the brunette was adamant to her words-no-_Penny's words _that she's refusing to hear Arizona.

"She also started accusing me of cheating. She made sure the whole hospital heard her. So I'm sorry Arizona. I'm sorry for doing that to you. I deserve all of this. Maybe this is my karma for being the worse person to you."

"No Calliope you do not deserve any of this. Whatever you did doesn't give her the right to hurt you." But no matter what Arizona says, it won't change whatever damage Penny has already caused Callie.

"I know. I always say I would leave once she goes on therapy but it never happens. I wanted to help her get back on her feet. I told her that we should move back here in Seattle and that's when she started acting out. She started throwing—throwing things at me. I always tell her she needs help but she doesn't want my help." Arizona was amazed on how Callie could actually control her emotions. She was crying at first but now there was nothing, no tears from the latina's face contrary to hers, her tears were incontrollable, they were just falling, she was hurting for whatever Callie went through–_is still going through._

"The—The final blow was three months ago when my co-worker dropped me home because she forgot to pick me up when she said she would. I knew we were gonna fight so I spared Sofia and sent her for a sleepover. Penny-she was so sure that I was sleeping with all the doctors and the nurses, even with a stranger from the grocery store. She was so sure! She had it set up in her mind and it was impossible to bend it. I got tired of it Arizona so I shouted at her. I pushed her and got my suitcase so I could go and she just turned into this monster. She's—she's smaller than I am so I don't know how it happened." Callie was just staring at the floor as she was sharing her story. A single tear fell on her eye but she quickly wiped it. She promised not to cry over it anymore. Arizona felt her own fingers in a tight fist as if she was ready to punch someone.

"She pushed me on the wall—" Callie started again.

"Callie you don't have to go into details if-if you're not ready yet." She could feel her stomach turning. Somehow she could already picture how bad Penny violated Callie. They've had many fights in their past but she never imagined hurting her ex-wife. She could never hurt her precious Calliope.

"No. No, I wanna face this. I wanna tell." Callie almost whispered despite her tears that are threatening to fall. Arizona just nodded.

"She-she pushed me on a wall, there was... there was a nail poking out so I bled. She didn't notice it so she—" Callie stopped when she heard Arizona gasp.

"I'm sorry Arizona. I could stop—"

"No. No. Tell me. Tell me everything. I wanna know. I'm hurting for you but I wanna know." When she saw Arizona cry that's when Callie cried as well.

"She continued hitting me. I was busy thinking about my head bleeding I couldn't even feel her hitting me. I wasn't even fighting back anymore. I was just scared. I was just mentally making a plan for me and Sofia. I just wanted to escape here in Seattle. She could've killed me. She was not Penny. She was not—" Arizona pulled Callie closer to her.

"I was gonna call the police and leave that night with Sofia, to come here to you." Callie admitted.

"Why didn't you do that, Callie?" Callie tilted her head so she could face Arizona. She didn't wanna see Arizona cry for her so she wiped her ex-wife's tears before answering.

"That's when she told me she has the video. She was watching it the whole day. She played it and watched it right before my eyes and then when I saw your uhm... naked photos I—I felt sick. I mean not because— I felt sick with the idea that she saw you and that other people would see you, all of you. Those were just meant for me and she got a hold of it. And then she threatened me to exploit it and I don't want to do more to disappoint you so I—I kept quiet and I stayed. All those months I stayed, I pretended to be okay because I was so scared that you would take Sofia away from me once you knew. I'm sorry."

"Calliope." Arizona couldn't even find it in her to get mad.

"Trust me I spent all my days retrieving everything back. Trying to make sure that she doesn't have anything left. I had to stay to make sure everything will be okay. I'm sorry that I had to keep Sofia, I can't send her back to you because she would, she— it was like walking on eggshells with her." Arizona nodded her head, letting Callie know that she understood. She grabbed Callie's hands again when she tried wiping her face non-stop as if crying was sin.

"I don't know what makes her mad anymore cause usually it's the smallest things and she hates it whenever I cry so I just acted normal around her but trust me, I never left Sofia's side. I—I barely even went to work. I just stayed with our daughter while I strategized a plan with Aria. That time Aria only knows about your video but she doesn't know that I was being a-ab-_abused_." and then Callie stopped, she couldn't even say the word. She doesn't even acknowledge it.

Arizona doesn't know if she could take any more. This was the most dragging 48 hours of her life. When she checked the clock, they still have 30 minutes before Christmas was officially over. How did time ever go this slow.

"I thought that was the worse but it turns out it wasn't." Callie almost whispered. She saw the darkness in Callie's eyes.

"It wasn't?! Did she hit you more?" Now Arizona sounded like a defensive mother to her child.

"She did but it still wasn't the worse thing. I could take all the beating or—or the painful sex toys she keeps forcing in me." She heard Arizona's ragged breathing.

"_Fuck_. I'm sorry Calliope. She did not. She— you should have called me. You should. She will go to jail. I will make sure that she does. What else did she do to you?" Arizona was now red and anger already clouded her that if Penny was in front of her she knows she would lose her license either way.

"It's not what she did but the rippled effect of what she did that kills me—killed me, perhaps. I don't even feel half alive right now." Callie explained.

"What happened Callie?"

"The day after our fight, my mom called me. I hated that week so much. It was as if karma was there to collect my dues." She chuckled but right after she just felt her sobs turn into a painful cry.

"She wants me to come home, Arizona. She wants _us_ to come home. I could still hear my mom crying on the phone telling me that she's forgiven me. She's forgiven us. And that she was _sorry_. She wants me to come home and she wants you to be there too and Sofia. She was really sorry Arizona. She wants to tell you that she was sorry. She wanted us there, beside her, on her death bed."

"_Oh_. Oh Calliope. I'm sorry, I didn't know." Arizona felt her body turn cold. Lucia died. Callie's mother died.

"She died two days after that phone call. I wasn't even able to go because I was covered with bruises and a fresh wound on my head. How could I even face them? How would I face my dad without him putting Penny behind the bars? Making up stories for Sofia was easy but I couldn't do the same with my parents, could I?" Arizona doesn't know what to say.

"My mom is dead Arizona and I still haven't fully grieved for her. I still haven't. I want to see her. I want to see my dad. I wanna tell him I'm sorry, I wanna tell him that no surgery is more important than my mother. That the moment she called me I wanted to run back home but I couldn't because I was so scared. I was weak and scared to ask for help. My dad was so mad at me for not showing up that he had a mild stroke. I caused him the stroke. I almost killed him so how could I possibly call him without killing him? I might trigger it again."

"Calliope, don't say that. That's not true. You heard Aria."

"I just want all of this to be over. I don't want anything to do with Penny anymore. I just wanna hug my dad, I just want my mom. I wanna see her. I wanna see her Arizona. I want to..."

"I-we will. We will Calliope. Okay?" She made a mental note to bring Callie and Sofia to Miami so they could pay a visit to Lucia's grave and to visit Carlos as well. Everything she heard was too much for her to take in. She wonders how Callie could still function, she just wants to hug her ex-wife hoping that by hugging her, she would be able to share the pain.

"I can't breathe Arizona. I-it's hard to breathe. It feels like I died with her and I've never been alive since. I feel dead inside." Callie choked on her tears. As if Arizona knew what she meant, she embraced Callie close and tight. Gently rubbing her back. As if it was the most natural thing, her body started rocking back and forth. She knows what losing a brother feels like but she doesn't know how different it was losing a parent. She doesn't know what else to say anymore, she knows that there's nothing she could say or do that could lessen Callie's pain.

"I'm sorry, Callie. I should've been there for you. I should have. I'm sorry." She whispered.

Callie didn't answer. She just held Arizona's arms and let both their breathing harmonize in peace.

"Y-you didn't know Arizona. If you—if you knew would you come? After all I did would you still come?" Callie doesn't even know why she was asking this.

"I'm here Callie. I'm here. And I wanna be here for you." Arizona's warmth was enough to calm Callie. Her words somehow steadied the fast beating in her heart. Callie just nodded her head, still enjoying the silence the two of them are sharing.

"You should probably rest. I'll get your clothes. You might get cold—" Callie actually felt the cold air when Arizona lost hold of her, like a little child she instantly grabbed Arizona's arm.

"Can—will you stay... please?" Callie quietly asked. Arizona wanted to stay. She just wants to hold her ex-wife until the rest of her pain is gone.

Arizona made it quick to change into her pajamas. She slowly took her leg off, not minding the way Callie was watching her. She climbed to bed next to Callie and wrapped her arm around the brunette. She was used to being the little spoon but tonight she motioned to be the big spoon. She missed Callie's scent mixed with hers. It brought back so much nostalgia, mostly all the happy memories she had with her ex-wife. She missed the way Callie feels in her arms, the warmth, the calm, the way Callie feels like home.

Callie was there for her during the darkest days of her life, although she succeeded on pushing her away, she will make sure to bring her wife back home.

"I don't want Sofia to know the truth—or at least everything. She doesn't need to know everything. Eventually she would grow up and ask me questions so I'm telling you now that I will lie to her. I don't want her to think that what I did was brave, I don't want her to think that staying in an abusive relationship was the right thing to do because it wasn't. But I don't regret doing it. I'd like to think that by staying I actually helped stop her from reproducing our sex tape. I'm sorry this has to happen to us, Arizona. I'm sorry she has to see it." Arizona nodded her head.

"I understand and I respect that, we'll get through this, just like how we got through all our misfortunes in the past. But for me Calliope, you are brave. You are brave for still fighting to be here for Sofia. You are brave for sharing your story with me and you are even braver for letting Aria and I help. Do you understand that? Do you understand how amazingly brave you are?" Arizona asked Callie who just nodded her head. If only Arizona could see the hint of smile on Callie's face then she would be really proud of herself.

"I am here now. I don't care about the video or the people seeing me. I don't care about being suspended for some stupid video. We were in love when we did that, we're not, in any way at fault. She ruined what's supposed to be private and intimate so we will fight back, okay Calliope? No one can hurt you and Sofia, not on my watch. You hear me?" Arizona added to which Callie nodded her head and held the arms wrapped around her tightly. This was the closest they've ever been in two years yet it felt natural for the both of them.

Callie needed Arizona's warmth to remind her that she is safe now the same way Arizona needed to feel Callie to make sure that she's safe.

"Thank you for staying, Arizona." Callie whispered before she yawned. She was truly tired.

"I'll be right here in the morning, Calliope." Arizona assured her.


End file.
